Breaking Barriers to Doing Corporate Consulting

Today's most enterprising therapists are realizing that the most promising opportunities for new business lie outside of the healthcare system. There, the people skills they honed with clinical populations can find countless new applications. Nonetheless, many established therapists, as well as current graduate students, go on seeking new clientele inside the healthcare marketplace. Developing new markets is the major challenge of therapists wanting to start up or remain in independent practice.

Lucrative business opportunities readily open when different segments of the marketplace are targeted. Corporate consulting represents one such major opportunity. Much contemporary corporate activity centers on technology issues, information processing, and creating business ecosystems. How well the necessary infrastructure works for optimizing these activities is rooted in the company's people. Daniel Goleman recognizes this in his work, Working With Emotional Intelligence, when he estimates that 90 percent of success in business leadership is directly attributable to "soft skills." People problems inevitably result when a company focuses too exclusively on technology skills.

Solving People Problems

Psychologists and counselors are eminently qualified to improve people skills in the work place. Therapists already have valuable knowledge and skills that can, with adaptation, be used to raise the emotional intelligence of company leaders, as well as to solve other business problems related to people. In order to successfully do so, there first are several major barriers through which clinicians must successfully break.

The first is re-conceptualizing the framework out of which they design and deliver consultative services. With clinical services, the major focus is upon understanding and relieving an individual client's personal suffering. To mistakenly view a company's people problems through this same framework of dysfunction and psychopathology will result in assigning medical diagnoses and starting psychotherapeutic interventions designed to remediate the individual pathology. In corporate work, only occasionally will the problem reside in a single person. Most frequently, the consultant seeks an understanding of how the organizational context motivates the employee's behavior and, conversely, of how the individual affects the company. “The business psychologist's emphasis is upon optimizing organizational results by altering people's behavior inside the organizational system.”

The conceptual framework includes any body of psychological knowledge that is relevant to the business problem at hand. The theory base for business psychology is the "the application of clinical psychology's traditional knowledge and skill base, modified and augmented by related knowledge bases (such as organizational development theory), to people working in business settings for the ultimate purpose of optimizing business performance. . . . The overall aim of business psychology is enhancing people processes and work performance—of individuals, teams, managers at all levels, and, ultimately, the entire business." (Perrott, Reinventing Your Practice as a Business Psychologist, p. 6,7)

“Therapists-turned-consultants use their knowledge of people (not psychopathology) to enhance corporate performance.” They use their own people skills to form and maintain multiple simultaneous relationships inside the company in order to bring about the desired organizational outcomes. Doing so is a departure from the typical therapist's clinical posture of detachment and reactivity, while focused on an individual person.

The second barrier is the sales barrier. If a consultant closes no sales, there are no opportunities to work. Opportunities to optimize company performance are created by sales of consultative services to companies. To create such opportunities, the sales barrier must be broken, and, to do this, the access issue must first be addressed: how to get into the company. Doors will be opened once a consultant has something of known value to contribute to the company. In order to design results-producing consultative services, therapists wanting to work in corporate settings must find ways for getting to know businesses from the inside, so as to learn about their common needs. This information provides the basis for designing value-adding consultative services. Regular reading of business-oriented publications such as the Wall Street Journal and Business Week teaches about the typical issues and problems businesses face and provides an ongoing resource for ideas about possible business solutions.

An excellent direct way to learn about corporate functioning is to take an administrative role in a corporate healthcare setting or, alternatively, accept a leadership work position in a non-healthcare corporate setting. A different means is vicarious learning through networking with people already employed in corporate settings. Joining service clubs, such as Rotary or Kiwanis, regularly brings together "meet and eat" gatherings of company people who are quite willing to discuss business issues openly. Yet another avenue for getting together with business people is active participation in Chamber of Commerce activities.

Once business issues become known and consultative solutions have been designed, active marketing approaches must then successfully create the means for actually setting foot inside businesses, so that sales relationships can be developed. Essentially, corporate consulting is a relationship business. Putting together effective promotional campaigns that establish attractive market positions is a fundamental step toward breaking the sales barrier. Regularly communicating with the business community about effective business psychology services that have been designed to fulfill corporate needs will establish the basis for eventually breaking the sales barrier.

quote:Closely related to selling is breaking the third barrier: that of relevance. Without creating a consultative service that has direct and positive impact on business performance, sales efforts for that product will go nowhere. The basis for repeatedly breaking the sales barrier is convincing companies how they will be better off after receiving business psychology services than they were before. “Aspiring consultants must use their organizational insights creatively to design an array of consultative services, each of which results in attention-catching business results.” A useful first exercise for a new consultant is to decide upon one or more very focused "starter services." Each is a narrowly targeted consultative service set up to fulfill some very specific business needs. The overall aim is to deliver the service quickly, producing business results that have large impact in small areas.

Case Example

One company has narrowed its field of choices for a newly created Team Leader position to two internal candidates. One is a young man of color in his late twenties who has been with the company four years. He seems bright, is articulate and well-liked by colleagues, and seems eager to learn. The other candidate is a woman in her early thirties who has been with the company seven years. She is vocal, an able problem-solver in her present assignment, ambitious, and widely admired. The company decision-makers are evenly split on whom to choose. Hearing about this dilemma, the enterprising consultant proposes using business psychology skills to assist the company solve this personnel problem. Through interview and administration of a brief battery of psychological tests, a profile of each candidate's strengths and limitations can be created and reported to the decision-makers. This information will provide a relevant, rational basis for the company decision-makers to use in deciding whom they will promote. To propose the sale, the consultant quickly arranges a meeting with several of the key decision-makers, in order to make a case for doing the assessment. In the sales presentation, the consultant emphasizes the benefits to the company of purchasing the service:

A.  the objectivity of the methods used;
B.  the advantages of having profiles of each candidate for comparison, rather than using subjective hunches; and
C.  the savings of company money and time resulting from making a data-driven choice.

After breaking the sales barrier, the business psychologist quickly begins actual delivery of the assessment. Arranging a meeting with the decision-makers allows inquiry into the specific job duties and responsibilities of the new Team Leader position, the characteristics of the work team, and, most importantly, the overall outcomes expected during the next year. In the hypothetical example here, the company is projecting bold team performance expectations and also expects that there will be considerable conflict of ideas within the team about how to achieve these goals. This high-powered work team is expected to become operational quickly. There will be little tolerance for inefficiencies or outcomes short of expectations. Excellent communication and outstanding problem-solving will be required, as well as the ability to lead a team swiftly through complex and ambiguous technical issues that could very suddenly and unexpectedly arise. After learning this, the consultant extracts the critical success factors for the new job and designs an assessment strategy to evaluate those areas. The consultant then conducts the managerial assessment with each candidate using structured interview techniques and psychometric instruments chosen to comply with ADA requirements.

One candidate's profile revealed a very restricted vocabulary, a repeated tendency to handle interpersonal conflicts through using minimizing and avoidance tactics, very high personal stress levels, and past leadership preferences for reliance on setting a strong personal example and use of verbal intimidation approaches during times of uncertainty. Which of the two candidates mentioned above would you guess had this profile?

The consultant reviews the two resulting candidate profiles with the company decision-makers, giving them the desired rational basis for deciding which candidate to select. Once they had the candidate profile outlined in the paragraph above, the decision-makers were readily able to decide that this was not the person they would promote into the new Team Leader position. “The company benefited here by not making a costly error in selecting a candidate who very likely would have fallen short of their expectations within the first year.” The overall savings to the company based on lost team productivity, lowered team morale, possible loss of valued team employees, and use of additional management time to rectify the error later more than offsets the cost of the assessment. Only after the sales barrier was broken could there be an opportunity to successfully tackle the relevance barrier, and then deliver the services.

Epilogue

Therapists have developed considerable people expertise that has direct relevance in corporate settings. But business psychology does not consist of simply transplanting the delivery of psychotherapy inside corporate walls. In order for clinicians to produce valuable business results, their clinical knowledge and skills must first be adapted and channeled for focused use there. It must also be supplemented with additional knowledge about organizational functioning and corporate issues that go outside most therapists' traditional paradigms. As therapists becomes more proficient at breaking the three barriers outlined above, enterprising new markets for psychologically grounded consultative services will open up inside corporate settings. Designing, selling, and delivering business psychology services is the basis for establishing longer-term relationships with corporations that can readily result in repeated sales over many years.

References

Goleman, Daniel. (1998) Working With Emotional Intelligence. New York: Bantam Books.

Perrott, Louis A. (1999) Reinventing Your Practice as a Business Psychologist. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass Inc

Hollywood on the Couch

My client (call him Larry) sits across from me, holding his stomach gingerly, rocking back and forth in his seat. His face, once seen smiling proudly next to a feature article about him in the Los Angeles Times, is now set in a rictus of pain.

"Jesus, my stomach's in knots," Larry groans. "I'm six weeks late with the script. Six weeks! The studio's climbing all over me, my agent's screaming on the phone." He looks morosely at me. "I swear, the problem is that goddamned Oscar. If only I hadn't won it . . . "

I nod. This is the familiar Oscar-as-jinx lament, one I've heard often from clients since I began my practice in Hollywood. After winning the Academy Award for Best Screenplay some years back, Larry's writing career careened from one disaster to another. His Oscar win resulted in an avalanche of job offers, which pushed his script fee into the stratosphere. The result? Every movie studio he worked for resented paying his huge fees, while every producer complained that his work for them certainly didn't seem to be "Oscar-caliber." The Hollywood buzz was that maybe Larry was a one-shot wonder.

Unfortunately, by now he'd traded up to a multimillion dollar house in the Pacific Palisades, had both kids in expensive private schools, and was the principal investor in his wife's Pilates studio. His nut, as they say, is killing him.

"Know what I did yesterday?" he asks, managing a tight smile. "I put the Oscar out in the garage. I swear, that thing is cursed. Evil. Like the devil doll in that old Twilight Zone episode."

Larry says he knows for a fact that the Oscar was cursed, because it had already jinxed him once before. He'd hidden it away in a linen closet while he was rewriting a thriller for Sony, but his wife had taken it out and put it on the mantle when his in-laws came to visit. Soon thereafter Sony cancelled the whole project."I think that's the reason the picture never got made," Larry says, giving me a knowing look.

I smile. "In my business, Larry, we call that 'magical thinking.'"

"Yeah, well in my business we call that going four years without having a movie produced. If I don't totally nail this script for Warners, my agent says I'm not gonna get my asking price for the next one. If there is a next one."

He stops rocking long enough to take a swig from his Evian water. "My big mistake was winning the damn thing in the first place. If only I'd just been nominated . . . when you're nominated, you pick up a nice buzz, maybe get a better agent. You're hot, but not too hot. You're on the radar screen, but you're not blinking. Not drawing all the heavy fire, know what I mean?"

In fact, I knew exactly what he meant. I'd heard other award-winning clients—actors, writers, directors—say pretty much the same thing. “Because in Hollywood, where everyone's goal is to attract attention, there are some people for whom the worst thing that can happen is to attract attention.” And then there are all the other people, for whom the worst thing that can happen is not to attract any attention at all . . .

Hollywood from the Inside

Formerly a Hollywood screenwriter myself for many years, I'm now a Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) in private practice in Los Angeles. My clients are primarily writers, actors, and directors in the entertainment industry. They range from the famous and successful to the unknown and struggling. And after 15 years of doing therapy in Hollywood, I can state one thing with complete confidence:

Doing therapy is the same everywhere. Except here, where it's different.

For example, my session with Larry illustrates one of the many paradoxes that creative people grapple with in the entertainment industry. Many of my most noted clients live for the big break, the surprise hit, the runaway success. But, when it happens, they often fear it's only a fluke—their talent fraudulent, their fabulous careers as fragile as the opulent houses precariously cantilevered over the earthquake-prone Hollywood Hills.

Of course, for my less-successful show business clients, Larry's "problem" is the kind of luxury they can only dream about. For these folks, it's a daily struggle just to maintain a career, much less an intact sense of self-worth, in the face of brutal competition, insatiable demands for the next new thing, and industry-wide contempt for the unyoung, unrich, and unbeautiful.

In such a roiling climate of soaring hopes, crashing defeats, and maddening near-misses, it's no wonder that my clients have an ambivalent, anxious love-hate relationship with the Hollywood Dream. They know the odds, but they're still driven to grasp for the shiny brass ring that's always, though sometimes just barely, out of reach. As one of my long-suffering writer clients remarked about Hollywood, "It's a place where anything can happen—and nothing ever does."

Doing therapy, of course, is doing therapy—whoever the client and whatever the locale. All human beings come with roughly the same emotional equipment and confront, with greater or lesser success, the same old dramas of love, fear, loss, anger, desire, ambition, and envy. And yet, the peculiar—not to say extreme—values and circumstances of Hollywood give these ordinary human dilemmas a unique twist that therapists are far less likely to see in, say, Toledo or Baltimore or Omaha. So “a lot of the therapy I do is to provide an opportunity for creative people to talk about their specific problems with someone who doesn't have an axe to grind and knows the intricacies of their business.”

For example, notwithstanding Larry's troubles, everyone in town hungers after awards. This is why, after practicing here for a while, you notice that there's an almost seasonal quality to the work. Just as accountants get swamped at tax time, I've noticed severe spikes in my clients' career anxieties during the annual frenzy of award nominations.

In recent years, awards have proliferated like viruses. Besides the old standards—the Oscars and Emmys—there are now the Golden Globes, the People's Choice, and the MTV Awards, as well as less-publicized awards (but crucial to the industry) bestowed by venerable union organizations like the Writers Guild, Directors Guild, and Producers Guild. Falling roughly within a four-month period, this annual harvest of award nominations—"the season of envy," one of my clients calls it—gives people in the business a wonderfully rich smorgasbord of opportunities for bitterness, resentment, despair, and self-loathing.

This year's Oscars were particularly galling for some of my clients, who've managed to battle their way into the Hollywood mass-entertainment production machine, but have never lost their yearning to be artists. With one exception (The Aviator), the Best Picture nominees for this year's Oscar awards were all independent films. Developed and produced outside the conventional studio process, these movies were more idiosyncratic and "character-driven" (read: "artistic") than typical, mass-market-oriented Hollywood fare. "See, those are the kinds of films I want to make," a director client bitterly complained. "But what does my agent set up for me? The next Scooby-Doo sequel!"

A successful actress in my practice fumed with envy about Hilary Swank's second Academy Award for Best Actress. "Excuse me, but she got both of her Oscars for playing women who get beaten to death! What's up with that? Is this some kinda trend? Maybe that's my problem . . . Everyone I've ever played is still alive at the end of the movie."

This is life in Hollywood for most ambitious people in the business: living in a state of extreme self-consciousness, feeling that your entire worth as a human being is being judged by people who are technically your peers, but much richer, more successful, and probably a lot cooler than you. Meanwhile, you secretly think you're as good or better than they are (when not worrying that you're really not), and desperately want them to like and accept you. You also suspect that they mostly don't know you exist.

Sound familiar? It should. Because, from my perspective, Hollywood is just like high school.

In high school, you try out for a spot on the basketball team or the cheerleading squad or the drama club's latest play, and, if you're like most of us, you don't get it. You spend hours honing your particular "look" in the mirror, working on cool repartee, practicing smoking a joint without choking, and flaunting the latest electronic gizmos money can buy. But the girl you want to hook up with still thinks you're a dork, and the guys you want to impress just look at you with bored, half-closed lizard eyes before ambling away.

So, what do you do for comfort? What everybody does: rationalize. You tell yourself that these people aren't worth the grief; that they're basically dumb jocks or silly little girls. You ostentatiously ignore them or loudly disdain them.

Likewise, my show business clients, feeling ignored or unappreciated by their peers, boycott watching the awards shows, cancel their subscriptions to the "trade papers" (Variety and The Hollywood Reporter) and, in sessions with me, indignantly list the many worthy, though obscure, films and TV programs that should have been nominated, if the awards weren't such monuments to fraud, irrelevance, and blatant commercialism.

For my clients working in television, I'd guess the ultimate pinnacle of Hollywood-as-high school happened the night a few years back when writer-producer David E. Kelley won an Emmy award for Best Comedy (Alley McBeal) and one for Best Drama (The Practice). Then he got to go home to celebrate with his wife, Michelle Pfieffer. “The fallout from that evening went on for weeks in my practice. How could any of my clients, no matter how successful, top that?” It's as though Kelley got to be both Class President and first-string quarterback, while making it every night with the Prom Queen.

Everyone remembers the rigid caste system of high school—the "royals" (the popular kids, good-looking girls, athletic stars, Big Men and Women on Campus) and the various lesser castes of brainiacs, greasers, and assorted wannabes.

Ditto Hollywood. For example, in the film business, there are those "above the line" (movie stars, producers, screenwriters, and directors) and those "below the line" (cinematographers, costume designers, makeup artists, etc.). While you might think such demarcations are only the concern of contract attorneys and accountants, the sociological ramifications of commingling these worlds can be huge.

Not too long ago, I had an initial session with a well-known movie actress, who burst into tears not 10 seconds after she sat down on my couch.

"I'm in love," she said with difficulty, "really in love for the first time in my life. We're engaged and everything."

"Congratulations," I said at a loss.

"But we can't get married!" She drew herself up. "I know I'm going to sound horrible, and like a total bitch, but I can't go through with it. I mean, everyone's telling me to call it off. My friends. My managers. And I love Gary, I really, really do . . . it's just . . . "

"What?"

"He's a set decorator, and, well, I just don't think I should marry below the line!"

She was entirely serious.

"And I'm not just thinking about myself," she went on. "You know what the tabloids are gonna do with this. Look at what they did to Julia Roberts when she married that cameraman. They made her life hell—and his, too. I can't put Gary through that." She looked down. "Or me, either."

"Have you discussed this with Gary? I can see how it would be difficult, but . . . "

"He brought it up to me!" she exclaimed, eyes shining. "He worries that he won't fit into my world. He even worries about what it might do to my career. He's very thoughtful like that. Why do you think I love him? He's so unlike all the other guys I've been with. He wasn't even married when we started dating."

She put her chin on her hands. "I'm not stupid. I know we don't exactly make sense. I mean, he drives around in a Range Rover. He goes fishing. But I also know it shouldn't matter.

"But it does?"

She took a breath, then slowly nodded. "Yes," she said a last. "I feel really shitty about it . . . but yes."

I saw that her pain was real, her conflict genuine.

But we both knew the reality of life in Hollywood—and in high school. Prom queens don't go steady with the A-V guys. Not without paying a price.

I never saw her again after that one session. Then, months later, I read somewhere that she and her fiancé Gary had broken up.

The Television Rat Race

Just as awards season is ending, something called "staffing season" begins. This is the three-month period when new and returning series are building their production staffs, negotiating with their returning stars, writers, and directors, and meeting with potential new employees. It's a harrowing ordeal for my clients, having their work evaluated by series producers and network executives, not knowing whether they'll have a chance at huge success or be thrown back into the oblivion of unemployment.

Again it's the unedifying spectacle of mature adults going through gruesome rituals that resemble nothing more than those that high-school seniors endure: taking SATs, writing endless college application essays, trying to impress college recruiters, wheedling recommendations from teachers, and waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting for their fate to be sealed . . . 

Nancy was in her thirties, a single mother of two whose last job as an executive story editor on a sitcom ended when the series was cancelled the year before. She'd been out of work since then, and dreaded the arrival of another staffing season.

"God, it's like a nightmare," Nancy said, pushing her hair back from her forehead. "I can't stand talking to my writer friends anymore. All we do is obsess about staffing season. 'Did you get a meeting?' 'Is your agent sending out your new spec script?' 'I heard they're looking for someone at Hope and Faith.'" She shook her head. "Talk about desperate housewives. . ."

Nancy recited her litany of complaints (I'd heard variations of it from all my writing clients): her agent wanted her to give in and write scripts for the kind of lowbrow sitcom she couldn't even stand to watch, much less write for. She was also furious because she'd been turned down as a script-writer for 8 Simple Rules, a show about a single mother. "They said I wouldn't be right for it," she said, her voice dripping sarcasm. "Of course not. I'm a single mom with kids, so how the hell could I write about a single mom with kids. Those pricks!"

I hesitated, then brought up a writing job on a little-known cable series—a show we'd been referring to for weeks as her "fallback" position.

"Christ, I don't even want to think about it," Nancy said. "Talk about the bottom of the barrel. If only my kids hadn't got kinda used to eating regularly."

She looked up, letting me see for only a moment the pain, yearning and desperation behind the sarcasm

"So what do you think?" she asked at last. "If I even get a meeting . . . and if they even make an offer . . . and if it doesn't completely suck . . . should I take it?"

She did, they did, it didn't—so she took it.

Quitting Time?

There's one issue that virtually all creative people in Hollywood wrestle with on an almost continual basis, on a scale unimaginable to clients in practically any other field of endeavor: namely, should they leave the business entirely?

In most professions, career success follows a more or less predictable trajectory. If you're a lawyer, banker, computer programmer, doctor, or the like, you spend a number of years learning your profession, then you generally ascend—if your job isn't outsourced or your CEO indicted for fraud—to a reasonable level of security, seniority, and maybe even pretty decent pay.

For the creative professional navigating a show-business career, there's no such path. Triumph and failure follow one another—in fact, feed one another—in a maddeningly erratic way. Hollywood is a notoriously fickle industry, where you can earn vast sums for a few years, then face a sudden and inexplicable loss of marketability, followed immediately by a severe cash drought. Not surprisingly, creative professionals spend an inordinate amount of time in therapy discussing whether to ditch the whole thing and start over.

Of course, many people in their forties and fifties go through midlife crises during which they wonder if they, too, shouldn't leave their boring law partnerships or real estate businesses and try their hand at running a B&B in Vermont. But, for most of these people, the crisis passes—they get therapy, they join a fitness club, they work on their marriages, they make modest changes in their careers that give them a larger degree of contentment and peace. The whole process is a one-time thing, with a more or less definable resolution at the end.

For Hollywood entertainment professionals, however, this "midlife" crisis afflicts them throughout their careers. Wondering whether to continue struggling against repeated rejections, chronic frustration, and financial hardship on the off chance of "making it"—or else, giving up and getting into something, anything more dependable—is the name of the game in this town.

At least weekly in my practice, a veteran show-business client—perhaps with a family, five projects in development, and a vacation home in Bali—gives me a haggard look and admits, with undeniable sincerity, that the business is driving him crazy, that he "can't stand the bullshit anymore," and that he's wondering if this is really what he wants from life. "Is it always going to be this bad?" he asks wistfully. "I spend half the time hating my job and wondering what I really want to be when I grow up."

And yet, very few clients ever do leave the business, regardless of the perfectly sensible arguments against continuing to struggle in Hollywood. Take Phil, for example, one of my clients who declared to me in the most melodramatic, forceful—not to say weirdest—way possible that he'd had enough.

In his mid-forties, Phil was an established TV writer-producer in my practice who one day left five breathless messages within the space of an hour on my voicemail, while he was on vacation in Kauai.

I called him back at the number he'd left, a lone pay phone near a cluster of cottages at some small, exclusive resort. I could hear waves lapping the shore, but I could barely hear him. He seemed to be whispering.

"Can you speak up?" I said.

"I said, I'm not coming back."

"To therapy?" This surprised me; I'd thought we'd been making some progress.

"Therapy? No . . . I mean, I'm not coming back to L.A."

"What? And why are you whispering?"

"I gotta keep it down. My wife's in the cottage, but the walls here are made outta leaves or somethin'. She'll hear me."

"Oh." A therapeutic pause.

"Look, I don't want her to know. Not yet. In fact, I'm thinking of letting her and the kids go back to L.A. without me. Tell 'em I need a couple extra days on my own to relax, unwind . . . "

"Is this true?"

"Are you kiddin'? I'm exec producer on a lame-ass series in its second season, with a bad time slot, and a flaming psychotic in the lead. What do you think?"

"But that's why you're on vacation. Some much needed R&R. Remote cottage, right on the ocean, no phones or faxes. Sounded great when we talked about it in session."

"It is great. That's why I'm not coming back."

"For an extra couple days . . . ?"

"For the rest of my life, man. But I'm not stayin' here. Too civilized. You can still get here by boat, or helicopter."

"I'm not following you, Phil."

"Damn right. Nobody is. See, once I get Helen and the kids on that plane home, I'm leaving this place and heading for parts unknown. Some little island off New Guinea, or maybe the Hindu Kush. Didja know they got parts there that are still unexplored, that aren't on any map?"

"You're serious."

"Hell, yeah. Look, I'm overweight, overworked, and overstressed. Buried in debt. I got a wife who hates me, two kids who hate both of us, an agent, three attorneys, a business manager, a domestic staff that rivals Brideshead, four cars, and a black lab that sees a grooming stylist and a pet shrink. With the whole damn thing on my shoulders. That means putting in an 80-hour workweek, cranking out jokes and story beats, with the goddamn network breathing down my neck, all while negotiating office politics that would baffle Elizabeth I. Fuck it, I'm goin' over the wall."

"Okay, I get how stressed you feel, how trapped. It can be very demanding, and murder on your personal life. But, if you work at it, you can find a balance . . . "

He chuckled wearily. "Hell, I've been looking for that balance for 18 years. I'm starting to think it's like net profit points in your contract—some kind of urban myth."

I tried a different approach. "Okay, let's say you just drop out of sight. Live on some uncharted island somewhere. What'll you do all day?"

"I was thinking along the lines of drinking and chasing women. And sleeping. Yeah, I got about a dozen years' worth of sleep to catch up on."

"That could get old. What about your mind, your creativity?"

"What's it done for me lately?"

"Well, it takes imagination to plot an escape from your life. A certain aesthetic daring."

"Yeah, I'm like David Copperfield. One minute I'm here, the next I'm gone. The Man Who Dropped Out." He paused. "Hey . . . wait a minute." There was a long silence on the phone.

"Phil? Phil? What's happening?" I asked. I could almost hear his brain whirring.

"I was just thinking," he said, "with computers and the net and satellite tracking, how hard it would be for a guy to really disappear. But finally, after all these close calls, he pulls it off. He's out, he's free as a bird. But then, what if his wife had to find him—their daughter needs a kidney transplant or something . . . "

I noticed his voice rising with excitement.

"But . . . " I said.

"No, listen. What if the guy's ex-business partner is looking for him, too? Millions are at stake. They hire these mercenaries to find him. Every episode ends with a cliff-hanger. Will they get him, won't they? . . . Uh, look, can we talk about that other stuff when I get back?"

"If you want. But I thought . . . "

"Shit, this is a great idea for a series, 9:00 slot. I can work it off that development deal I got at Fox . . . Hey, I gotta hang up and make some notes. See ya next week, our regular time?"

"I'll be here."

Hangin' In

There's an old joke about a man working in the circus, whose job it was to follow behind the elephants, sweeping up their droppings. When asked why he doesn't find some other line of work, he replies, "What, and leave show business?"

What makes the joke funny, of course, is the truth behind it. Creative and talented people, once having tasted the wild nectar of Hollywood success, find it almost impossible to quit the field, even when the odds are stacked against them. And nothing stacks the odds higher than committing the one unpardonable sin in Hollywood—getting older. As veteran TV writer Larry Gelbart said in a recent interview, "The only way to beat ageism in Hollywood is to die young."

At 58, my client Walter has been directing episodic television for most of his adult life—except for the past five years, during which, despite Herculean efforts to get work, he's been unemployed. He also got divorced and lost his house, and had to move to a condo in Thousand Oaks.

At a recent session, Walter announced more bad news. "My agent finally dumped me," he said quietly, without rancor.

"I'm sorry, Walter. I know you've been his client a long time."

"Twenty-one years. Lasted longer than my marriage. And the sex was better . . . " He managed a rueful smile. "Hey, I can't blame him. He busted his ass for me. But let's face it, nobody wants to see a gray-haired old fart like me on the set. Everybody there looks like my grandchildren. Hell, they could be my grandchildren."

As is often the case with clients in his situation, we talked about options. Walter agreed that he could probably teach, but that even teaching jobs were getting scarce and the money wasn't very good. Not that he was poor—he had a generous pension and some decent stocks. But the money wasn't really what bothered him. Right now, at 58, he felt he was a better director than at any time in his life. He knew his craft, he understood actors, he could keep his head in a crisis. But it seemed clear that nobody wanted to see a face much over 40.

"I might as well pack it in," he said gloomily. "My life in this town is over."

"Your life isn't over, Walter." I said to him. "Neither is your career. Unless you're ready for it to be over."

"What does that mean?"

"It means you don't have to let other people decide what you can do. Or how to feel about what you can do."

"Shit, don't get all therapeutic on me now."

"I'm not. I'm being pragmatic. If you want to teach, go teach. But if you still love directing, go find something to direct. A play. A short film. You say you have a few bucks. Okay, then hire someone to write something. Or rent an Equity-waiver theater down on La Cienaga for a week and put something up on its feet."

"Forget it. I'm used to working for studios. Networks. Guys with parking spaces on the lot, who at least have to pay me for the privilege of pissing all over my work."

"And I know how much you'll miss that. But at least you'll be directing. If that's what you still want to do."

"Hell, it's what I am." He sat back, stroking the edge of his trim, salt-and-pepper beard. Then he laughed. "Hey," he said, "remember that joke about the guy at the circus, cleaning up after the elephants?"

"One of my favorites."

"You think I'm that guy?"

"Walter, I think we're all that guy. These are the lives we lead, the things we do. If it's who we really are, all we can do is keep doing them. “As a colleague of mine said once, about trying to achieve in any profession: Keep giving them you, until you is what they want.”"

He paused. "You know, Alvin Sergeant is in his seventies, and he wrote the two Spider-Man movies. Huge hits. For years, David Chase couldn't get arrested, and then he creates The Sopranos. Hell, John Huston directed his last picture in a wheelchair, sitting next to an oxygen tank."

"All true."

"I mean, maybe I'm just kiddin' myself, but . . . " He nodded toward the door. "There's gotta be at least one more elephant out there, right?"

I smiled. "I've never known a circus without one."

Psychotherapy in China: Western and Eastern Perspectives

From Leicester to Shanghai

I have been living and working as a psychologist in China for the past four years. During this time, I have been teaching psychology, counselling, and psychotherapy courses to Chinese university students. I am originally from Leicester, Britain, where I was trained as a psychologist.

In this paper, I give my perspective based on my own experiences teaching counselling, counselling patients, interviews, and conversations with friends and colleagues in China. I also learned a great deal from the numerous families that invited me to stay with them for a week at a time to observe family life, including those who are from wealthy homes, as well as peasants in the countryside who could ill afford to share their food with me but graciously did. My research with women has come from over 200 interviews with women in China who told me their stories of their lives and marriages. The majority of my clients for my private practice came from referrals from students, other professors, Chinese friends and by word of mouth. Some of my clients came from the Internet who read my profile and sent email requests for help.

Getting a feel for Chinese culture

When I first started seeing clients in China I had to rapidly adjust to a different way of thinking by the Chinese patient. Although the issues were similar to those presented in any typical Western setting, such as relationships, depression, anxiety, family disputes, and lack of self-esteem, the Chinese mindset is profoundly different from my own in regard to their cognition and their way of thinking.

For a Westerner, it takes time to understand the subtlety of the Chinese way of thinking out problems and solutions. It helps to get a feel for the society, the pressures, the traditional ideals, and the judgmental, conforming behaviour. And I am always open to learning something new. You have to take your Western training and try to match the social consciousness of those you are trying to assist. This is not an easy process and does take time. All of my friends here are Chinese and I spend a lot of my time listening to how they see things; it is the only way to understand. Most Chinese do embrace Western culture and see it as an important part of their future and improvements to society. Of course, many Western ideas are not suitable to this society, so we discuss these issues as well.

Cultural factors and psychotherapy in China

What is the culture of psychotherapy in China? What makes up the thinking and feeling processes in the typical Chinese client? Understanding these questions gives us a beginning of how to understand and make trusting alliances with the Chinese patient. Several factors play a large role in the Chinese culture and character that affect attitudes toward seeking help and dealing with emotional difficulties.

Other-centered culture: Many Chinese people see their own problems as coming last compared to the welfare of others. While this is adaptive and socially valuable for the culture at large, it also keeps people from seeking help for themselves and taking a constructive approach to emotional and life problems. The Chinese client often thinks they are troubling the counselor with trifles and are more concerned about the therapist’s welfare than their own well-being. Knowing and appreciating this feeling as normative can also help move the focus to the client in a respectful and therapeutic way.

Culture of therapy? In China, there is almost no culture of therapy that is comparable to the Western culture of therapy. Indeed, there is a great mistrust among Chinese people toward authorities in general, perhaps going back to the cultural revolution and the intimidations and damage done to openness and trust during this time. Most people do not discuss their emotional turmoil with anyone, as they will lose face. In China there is a high degree of anxiety about judgement, criticism and evaluation by the state and other people. This, as you can imagine, makes it very hard to separate social norms from inner feelings. And it adds an extra layer of caution and suspicion when the client comes to see the counsellor.

Face: A crucial thing for the Western therapist to understand is that the Chinese client before them is not going to tell the truth in a direct manner due to the issue of face. This is not uncommon even among more free-thinking Western patients. However, for the Chinese this goes deeper. Face means not being put in a position of shame. In the culture as a whole, the taboo of mental illness is high. People will not admit to anyone that a family member has a problem of this kind or that they themselves are mentally unhealthy. The awareness of shame is very high and controls the daily aspects of business, government, and personal behaviour. A man whose wife is cheating on him will simply complain of headaches to the doctor and request some medicine to help him. To admit that this is in fact stress would be to admit weakness of character—so in turn the physical complaint is easier to cope with and address.

How shame and face affect therapy: First, even if you can get the person into a therapeutic relationship, they will avoid opening up about their concerns to avoid losing face in front of you. This then requires the therapist to begin sessions with an open honest approach to talking about shame and face directly to the patient. The client will instantly understand your meaning and seek a non-judgemental attitude from the therapist in return. It still may take several sessions for the client to trust the therapist before a real exchange of information based on the true nature of their problems comes forth.

Relationships and favour: In China the word relationship carries with it the factor of favour—that is, a relationship is about what you do for each other. Often, it is to one’s advantage that a person does a favour for you. In return, at some future point, you will return that favour—often many times bigger than the original favour. This system of relationships works through government, business, and in daily life.

For example, a university student is failing his course, so the father makes a generous contribution to the University building program, and the boy’s papers are then marked higher. In the West this is corruption, in China just a relationship being confirmed. In the future, the student may become successful; in turn one day he may be asked to contribute; he will feel under obligation to do so. It is this ongoing sense of obligation that causes a great deal of unhappiness in China. In England, we have the old-boys network: the inside practice of people from Oxford or Cambridge University giving jobs and promotions to those who, like them, went to the so-called right places. In China they have these forms of relationships born out of favour and return. Understanding this helps the therapist avoid being shocked and confused when favour is played out so directly.

Family (fealty) and the one-child policy: Family has always been strong in China and from an early age, family loyalty is seen as crucial to survival in the future, as one generation relies on the next for support in old age or infirmity. The one-child policy has dramatically affected the Chinese people’s experience and the lives of families. Under the one-child policy there comes an increased insecurity amongst the elderly and the young alike. Parents put enormous pressure on this one child from an early age to conform to educational expectations, moral responsibility, and the work ethic. In the past, maybe five or six children would have shared the burden, but today that is no longer true; single children feel the increasing need to make a success of life in order to care for their parents later. Cousins become brothers and sisters, which is an adaptive social support, but they cannot share the parental burden as each has their own.

The one-child rule is not rigid: one can have more than one child, but the state only recognises the first child as the recipient of state benefits and schooling freedom. Additional children become a financial burden to the parents. Girls are not appreciated in the family in the same way boys are. Although both genders tend to be over-indulged and spoiled in youth, the boys are definitely given more leeway and mothers’ dotage. In the past, boys were favoured over girls, and if a baby girl was suspected in the first pregnancy, it was often aborted or self-aborted under pressure by the family.

There are many issues that lead to the one-child policy that may seem quite unfamiliar to the Western point of view: over-population, not enough food, overcrowding in the city and lack of services in rural areas, shrinking agriculture and streamlining of production—all leading to massive unemployment and in some cases starvation and poverty. While the West may talk of the legitimate role and value of human rights—the right to choose to give birth or not—practical survival overrides this consideration in the minds of most Chinese people. “The impact of the one-child policy is yet to be known in terms of the psychology of these children, as well as the impact on society and families as a whole”, but it is something that is on the minds of psychologists, the people and the policy decisions of government leaders.

Clash of cultures: In modern Chinese cities it seems as if there is a KFC, McDonalds, or another mass-market fast food outlet on every city block. These fast food restaurants take away the traditional diet of high vegetable and low meat consumption. In return, the young are now enticed to a high-fat, high-sugar, and unhealthy but trendy diet of rubbish food. You can already see the problems of anorexia and obesity in children. The increase in cars and traffic in China is explosive and driving at high speeds is common with resultant high accident rates. The intensity and rate of change is so fast with the growth of the economy, population movement from the rural areas to cities, changes in family size and value systems, making it all quite stressful to keep up with and adjust to the changes.

Education: The educational system in China is very different from that in the West. It is based on memory learning and a strict examination system with little room for failure. Chinese schools manufacture the right qualities for the work place in conformity and strict adherence to authority figures. The system does not teach critical thinking, so wealthy Chinese often groom their one child to go to an overseas University to obtain a broader education, if they can afford it. The benefits of the Chinese educational system, including discipline and basic skills, are evident, but the pressures also impact the emotional well-being of the people.

Suicide: There are 25 suicides per every 100,000 people in China each year, compared with 15 per 100,000 globally. According to the Chinese Ministry of Health the leading cause of death amongst people ages 15 to 34 is suicide, which costs the country at least $3.5 billion a year and is second only to the US. A recent report by the Ministry on the nation's biggest killers listed suicide just after road mishaps.

Language issues: One Chinese woman inquired with me about how I could understand the Chinese psyche when I had no knowledge of the subtlety and non-verbal behaviour that accompanies the Chinese language and peculiarities of expression. I had to agree that this limits my understanding in some respects, which I attempt to fill in by asking more questions of the locals. Yet, as an outsider, I can report my experiences and observations, while people inside the culture give theirs; each view has its own intrinsic and unique value.

I speak about 200 common Mandarin words and can get by in most everyday situations, like in cafes asking for the check. Most of my clients are educated Chinese women and can speak good English. They start learning English from about age 12 and they think it is very important to their careers to speak it well. Occasionally, my Chinese assistants, some who are psych graduates, may sit in and translate, but this is quite rare. I have also found that being culturally aware and non-judgemental is more important than worrying about missing something. After all, it is for the client, not the therapist, to come to an understanding of self in order to cope with life’s problems.

Gender and society

There still exists a culture of male power, ownership, and control (of the money and wife). I have seen a mild change in Shanghai, because here many women out-earn men, creating a whole new social reality for both genders. Historically, women were not seen as integral to long-term family economics. This is traditional in the sense that boys were seen as continuing the farming and family work. Daughters would be married off to another village as quickly as possible, as this saves money in the long run. Even in modern China, parents still find it hard to imagine their daughters bringing in sufficient money to keep them in old age and so encourage good economic matches for marriage. A woman’s first boyfriend is often the husband-to-be, which leaves little room for comparisons and making informed choices.

China is a society dominated by men in all political, social, and business arenas. At one company I visited it was clearly the wife who ran the business and handled the money, but it was the husband who fronted the company to visitors and potential customers. Many male businessmen instinctively talk directly to the men as if the women are not even present.

Chinese women’s relationships and marriage: My exploration of Chinese women and marriage began by accident as much enquiry does: a few remarks here and there by Chinese women, the experience of suicides on campus, the attitude of the men in China and my own experience with living in Chinese homes. These chance remarks and conversations led me to a question: why are so many Chinese women unhappy in their marriages? In most of the homes I stayed in, I could feel the tension between the husbands and wives, almost a tangible atmosphere of resentment.

Most of my clients, who were women, came to me through recommendations via their friends. They seemed to know intuitively that I would not judge them; perhaps being an outsider helped. At first, my insight was rather poor, but as I understood the culture more, I was able to help many of these women face their lives with new hope, often through the technique of reframing: helping them to re-look at their lives and make some positive moves for change.

There are many factors and social pressures that impact women’s lives and marriages in China including the question of love vs. material security, the influence of the husband’s mother on the new wife, and the gender issues between men and women with regard to economic power and control.

Love vs. material security: Often women marry for material considerations and not for love. In my experience, women agree with the wishes of the parents wanting security for their daughters, but through years of socialization, they too believe this is in their best interest. Love is a luxury you cannot afford if you want to survive in a country with undeveloped social services and poor chances of surviving on one’s own.

In the United States about 50 percent of all marriages are now ending in divorce and these marriages were apparently based on love matches. The Chinese use this information to support the notion that love is just a temporary madness that soon dies. They have a point, but there may be other ways of understanding this issue. Most research shows that in order for a relationship to last, the couple needs to have common interests and shared goals in life. It is often when these areas diverge that divorce rears its head in the West. For the Chinese, marriage is about security, loyalty, and family, with love not being a valued factor, at least before marriage.

The wife and the mother-in-law: The new wife is traditionally seen as a new servant by the husband’s mother. Even today, women are often expected to join their husband’s family. Today, some young couples are talking about getting their own apartments and with it some privacy and freedom. Two things seem to get in the way of this: first, the spiralling costs of apartments in China reinforce the old ways, and second, the husbands often invite their mothers to live in the same house or provide her a room for whenever she wants to stay (often months at a time).

The traditional husband: The traditional husband sees the wife in ownership terms and believes her first loyalty is to his family and particularly his mother. Therefore, many wives feel marginalised in the marriage by the husband’s family. Chinese men rarely talk about these issues and they have great difficulty expressing themselves when they do. However, many women reported to me that they suspected their husbands of having girlfriends on the side. For the most part, men seem satisfied with this arrangement of wife and girlfriend, as the wife takes care of all his domestic needs and the girlfriend is his emotional outlet.

In most relationships and marriage difficulties, it takes two to make it and two to solve the problems. The man’s side of relationships and marriage is certainly worthy of more study and investigation. However, at the time of this writing, it is highly unlikely that a husband would come to a therapy meeting, let alone discuss his personal feelings. Perhaps this will change as the men and culture change, as well as new methods are developed to connect to Chinese men in ways that make sense to them. Women in China, however, given the opportunity to talk to a therapist, will open up and share their experiences. “The most important factor for them is a non-judgemental attitude from the therapist and confidentiality; these bedrock therapist traits and attitudes transfer just about anywhere in the world.”

Case examples

A few examples will help give a sense of the common themes that women have brought to counselling. One 27-year-old woman, Jiang (pseudonym), had been married for a few years and contacted me for a talk. She explained how, having married for the prospect of security, she now found herself mostly alone and with no common interests with her husband other than daily hassles such as rent and food. He ignored her emotional needs and Jiang felt isolated within his family.

I have heard these same stories so often now that it has become somewhat of a pattern. The issue is often one of security over emotional needs. For the woman, at first, emotional needs are not as important if she is secure from poverty, but as time goes by the loneliness of two people with no common feelings eventually leads to a major sense of loss and depression.

Another client, Li Ching (pseudonym), met her boyfriend at the university. They were together for four years, and in the final year they had sex for the first time in a backstreet hotel. Li Ching did not enjoy it. They married a year after leaving the university. Now married five years, Li Ching is extremely unhappy. Moreover, in a country with a history of a one-child policy from the government, Li Ching did not want any children; this is frowned upon by all in the husband’s family. She approached me to discuss her worries. Li Ching is now 28 years old and the first thing she told me was, “I do not love my husband and never have.” She had been unhappy for some time and often frequented night clubs with her girlfriends to dance out her frustrations. She had recently started to learn the Spanish language and at a club met a Spanish man. After a few months, she started to have an affair with this man and reported to me that she has discovered her sexuality and thinks she is in love.

Li Ching found a way to temporarily alleviate her pain via the affair, though of course such a method brings other difficulties and challenges such as divorce and potential shame from family. I am certainly not recommending an affair as a means of coping, only that in this case that is how this woman sought relief from her situation. Many Chinese wives do not see a way to improve their marriages or to find a way out—and rather than face the shame of divorce and the loss of face in the family, become severely depressed and feel that taking their life is the only viable option. Even in the countryside, some women take their lives with industrial fertilizer or pesticide, easy to obtain on farms.

The suicide rate amongst young women in China is high, as I have noted earlier, and it is often an option expressed by those who feel hopelessness. I have heard too many of the women report they had contemplated this end, and this has made me more determined to help where I can. Therapy is not a cure, but a system to help people cope in the world they inhabit. I am happy that, in my experience, most clients report improvement and the increased ability to control their own lives and decisions.

I have witnessed some happy marriages in China, but my research was not to look for happy marriages, which could be the topic of another paper. Instead, my research was to look at what was going on in the unhappy marriages that so many women were talking about.

One great thing about the Chinese clients I have seen, and in this case it is overwhelmingly women who come for counselling, is how loyal they become to people who have a therapeutic relationship with them. Even after treatment has ended many go on to write regular emails to let me know how they are getting on and many are on MSN, Yahoo, and Skype and often say hello and bring me up to date. The Internet has been an important tool for ongoing client support.

Psychotherapy training in China

When I first came to China four years ago, I worked in the research department of the Hubei University in Wuhan (central China). I am currently in Shanghai where I work as Clinical Director for a counselling training company and an EAP provider. At this company they train counsellors for the China licensing body. One of my assigned tasks here in China has been to train a new generation of young therapists with a Western perspective on client treatment. Another task is to supervise the trainers, who are often Chinese professors. The therapy organizations that do exist in China are not training on a wide scale. A beginning-level licensing system does exist and it is fairly easy to pass if you have enough money and time to train.

In China the students learn about the different forms of psychotherapy over an 18-week period, followed by 18 weeks of training in cognitive behavioural therapy and 18 weeks of transactional analysis. This educational background, coupled with experience counselling patients with supervision, gives them a beginning foundation from which to counsel clients.

The classes I teach are at different levels, ranging from undergraduates in their third year (they all do four-year degrees here) through Masters Degree students. Most of the Masters students concentrate on School Psychology and counselling for children with difficulties at school as well as how to handle exceptional children and mental retardation. Many of these Masters-level students go on to become teachers in middle or primary schools where they also act as the school’s counsellor and teacher advisor.

Many students will end up in fields other than psychology, having achieved better people skills and management potential. However, many also become counsellors at schools and colleges. Some who become full-time counsellors often keep in touch with me when they need help or advice. I have set up a peer supervision group for trainees to overcome the shortage of supervisors since many counselors often report to non-professionals. As for post-graduate internships, this is almost unheard of here.

It has been my experience that most Chinese clients are generally not good candidates for Western-style cognitive behavioural therapy—it is too direct and challenging and makes them withdraw. Although CBT has been seen as quite useful for many Asians in the US because of these directive qualities, that has not been my experience. (See a different view of CBT in Chinese Taoist Cognitive Psychotherapy article and in Commentary below.) From my experience, it seems that traditional psychodynamic therapy is often not active nor supportive enough in its Western form for the Chinese client. (See Psychoanalysis in China, September Archive for another take.) I have found that transactional analysis (TA) works very well here.

Chinese people and clients readily understand Eric Berne’s model of the Parent, Adult, and the Child ego states. TA also talks about drivers, life positions, OK-ness, critical parents, and nurturing parents, which are all clearly understood. The one area of TA they all agree on is the position and dilemma of the adapted child—the child who seeks to do anything to survive by following the parents' lead.

Chinese psychotherapy students

Generally, my Chinese psychology students really enjoy learning about therapy and the techniques applied in a Western counselling format. Most had serious arguments with their parents about their choice of majoring in psychology. Parents would argue that there is no money or jobs in psychology, it is not secure, and would not help with getting a good marriage, as well as many other future catastrophes. For the students who managed to stand their ground, they had to endure enormous pressure. This means as a teacher you end up with strong-minded students, keen to prove their choice was the correct one and wanting and demanding the best teaching. For a teacher to have a room of 30 to 50 students who are attentive to your every word is heaven sent, and I am quite grateful.

At first, “many students find it hard to let go of their cultural prejudice and allow clients to be themselves versus a preconceived idea of the Chinese social norm.” Many students report great difficultly in getting their clients to talk to them about feelings and they spend a greater part of sessions hearing about the goals and plans of the client, subjects clients present to avoid dealing with their emotional turmoil.

My students commonly reported that their clients do not trust them to keep confidentiality, which is as much based on distrust of authority as it is a view on therapy. The most common client reasons for hesitance to open up are, “I am okay, these feelings will not last,” “I will have to suffer,” and “It is the Chinese way.” Clients are part of a collective culture and mindset of shame-based attitudes, distrust of authority, and a persistent stigma about emotional troubles, thus making trust a difficult task to accomplish in therapy.

New counsellors in the West find it hard at first to relax a client enough for them to feel trusting and confident, but the clients usually expect and accept that therapy is a supportive tool despite their fears. In China the counsellors must work extra hard to gain the trust and confidence of the wary client. Unlike my students, I have had many years of experience as a therapist and know how to help most clients relax and open up fairly quickly. The counsellors I have trained directly have had rocky starts but they pick up these skills in time and soon find their own style of doing things, just as any Western trained therapist does.

In class exercises, when students practiced counselling each other, the female students found it particularly hard to get male clients to talk or share. The male students found it impossible to discuss personal problems with women. Thus, gender roles and issues must be considered and accounted for in working with Chinese clients as well.

Each student has to see psychotherapy clients over the training period at the undergraduate level. They produce a three-part report after each session to the supervising psychologist. At the end of ten sessions they must produce a three-page report summarizing their experience—a case biography, their assessment in technical terms of the clients presenting problems and their action, and exploration of their own feelings that came up while conducting the therapy and how it affected their thinking and outlook. This information enables the supervisor to interview the students and to understand the insights they gained.

The future of psychotherapy in China

It is my hope that mental health services can expand in China and different forms of psychotherapy and counselling will be accepted as normal for ordinary people to access with confidence. However, much progress in the view toward people who suffer from mental and emotional difficulties is needed so that help can be sought out without the fear of shame or losing face; it took a great amount of time for this to occur in the West, and there is still progress to be made there as well.

Certainly, new theories and techniques that are tailored to the Chinese people must be developed as Western and Chinese therapists alike gain more experience and insight. There are signs of greater acceptance of counselling and psychotherapy as witnessed by the training programs and the numbers of students interested in pursuing training, as well as the people who come to and benefit from counselling.

A personal note on my experiences in China

I have found the Chinese people to be friendlier and more willing to help others in a crisis than the people in most of the nations I have been to. I have been made more welcome in Chinese homes than ever in the West with its fortress mentality. The Chinese see each other’s efforts as having a direct effect on everyone and therefore are very considerate of others’ feelings and opinions. I have seen that they sometimes find a Westerner’s directness very unsettling, which I have learned to adjust to. In therapy, I have found that it is key to take into account the relationship as being of greatest importance to the client. I imagine that is true everywhere, and no less true here.

I would rather live in China than most of the hundred-plus countries I have visited over the years. The lifestyle is relaxed and informal—and I feel quite happy each day, since I am treated well by most everyone I meet. There is also a rich cultural history here and beautiful scenery, buildings, and art, which I enjoy often.

My appreciation: Thanks to the following participants in my explorations into Chinese life, culture, and relationships: ZheJiang Normal University, Institute of Psychology; Hubei University, School of Psychology; Shanghai Pinghe International School; the over 200 women in China who told me their stories, and the numerous families that invited me to stay for a week at a time in their homes in the city and the countryside.


Commentary by Hui Qi Tong


In this commentary, Hui Qi Tong explores questions and ideas raised in Dr. Myler’s account. As a Chinese woman trained in medicine and psychiatry in China, having worked as a psychotherapist and clinical researcher in the US and China, and now in a psychology internship in a doctoral program in California, she gives her unique perspective on psychotherapy in China, Taoism and CBT, women in China, the role of shame, and her work with Chinese American clients.

From Shanghai to San Francisco

From China to the USA, and from the East Coast to the West Coast, I have worked with clients in both clinical and clinical-research contexts. Thus, I was pleased to be asked by Psychotherapy.net to offer my commentary on topics raised by Dr. Myler on psychotherapy in China as well as to offer some of my own thoughts based on my experience of having worked with clients in China and Chinese American clients in Massachusetts and California. It is my hope that my commentary and explorations will broaden the dialogue on the topic of psychotherapy in China.

Below, I offer an abbreviated history of my journeys in psychiatry and psychology to date, not just to introduce my training but, more importantly, to show the multiple ways that the worlds of east and west have come together in my work.
  • Shanghai, China: I received my Master’s degree in Medicine (equivalent to an M.D. in the USA), specializing in Psychiatry from Shanghai Medical College, Fudan University, in 1994. I did my residency training in psychiatry at the Shanghai Mental Health Center and the Psychological Counseling Center, Zhong-shan Hospital, a teaching hospital of Fudan University.
  • Boston, Massachusetts: I came to the United States to join a research lab at Children’s Hospital in Boston in 1995. After about six years doing genetics research on neuromuscular diseases, I went back to the psychiatry field and worked as a Clinical Research Associate in the Psychiatry Department, Tufts University School of Medicine.
  • Shanghai, China: In 2001, I interviewed suicide attempters and their families as an ethnographic assistant for a multi-site study on Attitudes Toward and Cultural Meanings of Suicide in Contemporary Chinese Society, a project funded by the Chinese University of Hong Kong.
  • Palo Alto and San Francisco, California: Since 2002, I have been a graduate student in the PhD program in Clinical Psychology at Pacific Graduate School of Psychology. I have served as a research collaborator and content expert for the Chinese Caregiver’s Assistance Program at Stanford University and I am currently a psychology intern with the San Francisco Veterans Administration Medical Center.
Now, I turn to my experiences in psychotherapy with clients in China and the United States, engaging the questions of Chinese culture, women, Taoism and CBT, my ideas about working with Chinese clients, and the status of mental health and training in China.

Seeing clients in China

While in China, where I was from, I saw clients at the Shanghai Mental Health Center in both the outpatient and inpatient units. Most of the patients are walk-in patients without scheduled appointments. I did not know who to expect to see before they came in the door. Patients were usually accompanied by their family members who sat with the patients during the visit to provide collateral information. As most patients had severe psychopathologies, besides observation of the patients, I relied heavily on the information on symptoms and medication provided by family members. While on the inpatient ward including a locked unit, I was assigned a few patients with diagnoses ranging from schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder to bipolar disorders. My work was closely supervised by the attending psychiatrists on the ward.

The experience with the Counseling Center at Zhong-shan Hospital was quite different. Zhong-shan Hospital is one of the top general hospitals and the clients seen there are mostly with neurotic disorders. However, clients with early-stage schizophrenia were often seen there as well. Many families prefer to go to a general hospital rather than a mental health center which is less private and more stigmatized. The patients waited outside the room. The nurse gave them symptom measures such as SCL-90 and BDI for new clients before the psychiatrist saw them.

All of the therapists in the Counseling Center were psychiatrists. I first worked with my supervisor, Dr. Jun-mian Xu, observing him doing therapy. Most of the time, he prescribed medication as well, both Western and herbal medicine. He wrote the prescription on the patient’s record book (patients at the outpatient clinic kept their own medical record at that time) and I then copied them onto the prescription paper.

Most of Dr. Xu’s clients were scheduled in advance through the outpatient registration. He had to limit the number of patients he could see in one afternoon. I still remember we were always the last ones leaving the outpatient building on Saturday evenings around 7 pm. He saw 10 to 15 clients for an average of about 25 minutes each. Later on I started to see clients independently and discussed cases with senior colleagues, i.e., attending psychiatrists. However, there was no formal supervision when I worked there in the early 1990s.

Around that time, three or four of Dr. Xu’s graduate students, including myself, were learning Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and we all did our dissertations related to CBT, e.g., validating Beck’s Hopelessness Scale, studying the cognitive style of Chinese who were depressed, etc.

During my work there, I did not feel that it was difficult connecting with patients though I worried that I was much younger than the majority of my clients. I found that discovering commonalities between myself and patients was often a big help to bridge the differences between us and build an alliance. For example, one of my male clients, much older than I was and a well-established engineer who just returned from Britain, insisted that we use English in our work. I gladly tried that as I’d been interested in language as well and it readily made him feel comfortable and open.

Being open to psychotherapy?

In my discussions on the question of psychotherapy with Chinese people, many have raised the question, “Will Chinese clients share their deepest emotions/feelings? Will they open up to a stranger?” Speaking from my own experience, sure they do, but not in the same way that clients from the West might. In a similar way, I heard many times that group therapy won’t work for Chinese as Chinese people won’t share their deepest feelings or won’t “air their dirty laundry.” Now there is much group work done in China, especially since Irvin Yalom’s classic The Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy was introduced to the Chinese mental health community.

I also attended groups in the Chinese Community in the Bay Area in Northern California with patients and/or family members. They did share in a group setting. They may be sharing in a way different from what we expected and different when compared to people who were raised in the West, but isn’t each individual unique in telling his/her stories and sharing his/her experiences with another person? To further explore these issues, I turn to the next common question: What is the role of shame in Chinese culture and how does it impact psychotherapy?

Shame and psychotherapy in Chinese culture

The Chinese character of shame has two radicals: an ear on the left; and a stop on the right. Literally, anything you don’t want others to hear would be shameful. Shame can be distinguished from guilt: a total self-failure vis-à-vis a standard produces shame, while a specific self-failure results in guilt.1 The universal view of shame states that shame is one of the quintessential human emotions and feelings of shame are the same cross-culturally, which makes a lot of sense to me. Chinese culture values individuals who have a sense of shame, who know right from wrong and who have an awareness of falling short of a standard. In Western society it is not socially desirable to be shameless either, though what brings it about could be quite different. Culture plays a significant role in what precipitates shame, how shame is expressed and handled.

Thus, what is normal in one culture could be viewed as shameful in another. For example, sending aging parents with dementia to a nursing home for Chinese American caregivers is often viewed as something shameful as it violates the Confucian value of filial piety. Chinese families tend to rely heavily on family resources and do not seek external assistance until the internal resources are exhausted. Institutionalizing frail elders seems to be abandoning them. While guilt or shame may accompany family experiences in the West, nursing homes are home to many Western elders despite such feelings and the reaction seems quite different. “Slurping noodles while enjoying the deliciousness of the noodle and the soup is culturally acceptable in China, however, it will bring embarrassment and shame if you do this even in a Japanese noodle house on Castro Street in San Francisco.” Indeed, I was taught by my English tutor not to make noise while eating before I came to the United States. But something I would see as rude, such as blowing one’s nose as loudly as one pleases in the office, is common practice in the U.S.

Shame also was a theme that emerged in my discussions with colleagues on suicide in China. One colleague told me about his cousin’s tragic suicide in the 1980s in rural Hunan province after finding out that she was pregnant: “She was so ashamed.” Pre-marital pregnancy was often viewed as a moral debacle, but an induced abortion required a marriage certificate or connection with medical staff at that time. Moreover, it could bring shame upon the whole family where the parents would be blamed as being incapable of raising their children properly. The young girl experienced her pregnancy as a failure to conform to the moral standard on her part and used death to get rid of the shameful feeling, at least from the perspective of her cousin.

While some amount of shame in a culture can help people get along, be considerate and avoid hurting others, there is also a downside. In the past decade, researchers in China began to study shame, mental health and personality among college students. Students who were high in shame tended to have a stronger sense of worthlessness and powerlessness and presented more self-denial and escapism in difficult situations.2

A collective, inter-dependent culture with standards that involves a prominent focus on consideration toward others is also more shame-prone. Over time, I learned as a parent, when my son did something unacceptable, to communicate, “I love you, but I don’t like what you just did,” instead of communicating, “You are not a good boy,” so as not to elicit unhealthy shame so common in traditional parenting.

The Western humanistic value of self-actualization can be viewed as shameful in a culture like China that emphasizes conformity, causing clashes between satisfying individual needs and the needs of others. I personally know Chinese American college students who gave up their own career goals to conform to their parents’ demands in order to be dutiful children as valued by the Chinese culture. However, they became very depressed as a result.

Shame would be a very relevant issue to bear in mind when working with Chinese clients in psychotherapy. Characteristics like being incapable of holding down a job, establishing a family, or fulfilling the duty as a child, could be viewed as imperfect in regard to the standards of the Chinese culture and society in which one lives, and are common reason for the occurrence of shame. Family history of mental illnesses, of violence and trauma, especially childhood sexual trauma, is very sensitive information that could be shame-laden.

Therapists first need to be comfortable asking such questions. They may need to provide a rationale for gathering such information and to normalize it as part of a routine procedure while remaining empathetic and supportive throughout. Sometimes, the client may take several steps or sessions to share the information they feel deeply shamed about. Once they do open up, they often experience a huge relief and it can be very healing as, perhaps for the first time, they are able to go through the darker and desperate roads with their therapist's support and witness.

The Chinese woman, the Three Obediences and the Four Virtues

The traditional Chinese feminine ideal, as it is handed down from the earliest times, is summed up in the Three Obediences and the Four Virtues. The Three Obediences are: when unmarried, she lives for her father; when married, she lives for her husband; and when widowed, she lives for her children. The Four Virtues include: womanly character, womanly conversation, womanly appearance, and womanly work. As the Chinese community is going through rapid social and economic changes, these deeply ingrained ideals about women’s roles and responsibilities are changing quickly. Women are becoming more independent and most women in China work outside of the home: “Half of the sky belongs to women.” However, this can also become a double burden as women have to face the same pressure in work as men, as well as being expected to be good housewives and homemakers.

The fact that China has one of the highest rates of female suicide in the world is deeply disturbing and warrants continued in-depth research. One may argue that Chinese women are not the most oppressed in the world. However, according to World Health Organization statistics, China is the only country in the world where more women commit suicide than men. (Of note, in the United States, more woman than men attempt suicide but overall, there are more completed males suicides.) Social, cultural, economic and healthcare system factors all contribute to the phenomenon. Suicide can be understood as social resistance or protest against an oppressing patriarchal system, e.g., the last strategy used by disempowered women against maltreatment and brutality in an oppressive marriage.3

As the society keeps changing, the ambivalence about gender roles will still exist. Women will likely continue to be more dominant in the domestic domain while their roles in workplaces will be increasingly recognized. Traditions will continue to weigh heavily on women but with education, job opportunities, and improved women’s rights, they will have more inner and external resources to deal with difficult situations in their lives. With greater material security, both men and women will increasingly be able to seek a bond based on true feelings.

CBT and Taoism in China

In North America, I often hear the speculation that the directive approaches to psychotherapy match well with Chinese people’s respect for authority and their advice-seeking behavior. Indeed, this makes apparent sense. The structure of CBT also works well for a population that emphasizes learning and education. The practical, present- and future-centered focus of CBT also resonates well with Chinese people. Dr. Jun-Mian Xu, my supervisor and dissertation Chair at Fudan University in Shanghai, first introduced cognitive behavioral therapy to China after finishing a fellowship in Canada. He and his team have been working from this approach since the late 1980s and have trained hundreds of clinicians in CBT. Now, over 20 published studies have examined the effectiveness of cognitive behavioral therapy for depression, anxiety, sexual dysfunction, and personality disorders, with promising results.

Chinese researchers are searching for cultural adaptations of CBT to fit better with the Chinese people. Asserting the influence of Taoism on Chinese cognitive and coping styles, Zhang, et al4 and his colleagues developed Chinese Taoist Cognitive Psychotherapy (CTCP). “Clients are helped to achieve deep understanding of philosophical tenets such as “restricting selfish desires, learning to be content, and knowing when to let go,” “being in harmony with others and being humble, using softness to defeat hardness,” “maintain tranquility, act less, and follow the laws of nature.”5” Results of a randomized controlled study involving 143 patients with generalized anxiety disorder support the efficacy of CTCP.

Dr. Gallagher-Thompson’s group at Stanford University has finished one of the first randomized controlled-outcome studies of a multi-component CBT-based manualized treatment for Chinese family caregivers for dementia patients in the Bay Area, Northern California.6 They found that this group of Chinese American caregivers were receptive to CBT and those that received treatment experienced less subjective burden and had substantially reduced depressive symptoms than the comparison group who received bi-weekly telephone support. Currently, pilot studies using this manual are being carried out in California and Hong Kong.

Psychotherapy with Chinese American clients in California

When I began my studies in Clinical Psychology at the Pacific Graduate School in 2002 I was most interested in psychotherapy as well as the training systems in California. In my second year, I did a practicum in a community counseling setting. Since 2005, I was first an extern and currently have been a psychology intern working with the military veteran population at the San Francisco VA Medical Center. In my clinical work, the greatest challenge has been the differences between me and most of my clients in terms of our linguistic, ethnic, and cultural background. At the VA, we emphasize cultural competency as part of the growth of the therapist and the psychotherapy work. I often invite my clients to ask any questions and bring up concerns they have about me in terms of my education background, culture, language, etc. This often becomes the first step in building a rapport with my clients.

I also worked with a wide variety of Chinese American clients, from the university students struggling with intergenerational conflicts, career choices, and sexual identity, to Chinese American veterans from WWII, to newly returning veterans from Iraq. I first assumed that, since I am Chinese, it would be easier for me to connect with Chinese Americans. I found however, it depends on many factors such as the level of acculturation of the client and myself, the language, expectations about therapy, past experience of therapy, beliefs about mental health disorders, and personal fit.

For example, I was quite careful when I made my first phone call to a client referred to me, as he was ambivalent about coming into therapy. It became clear early on that this young Chinese American refused to “be fixed” by a therapist as he experienced his parents as having tried to fix him all of his life. We set out with time-limited therapy with eight sessions and started there, being sensitive to the core issues in his life.

Though each individual is unique, there are some common themes that emerged in my work with Chinese American clients. For example, most of them don’t talk about their depression or PTSD with family members. When asked, the two most common reasons given were: the stigma attached to mental disorder, and the concerns about burdening their parents, ““my parents won’t understand and I don’t want to make them worry.”” While I seek to honor the traditional values of respecting one’s parents, I also emphasize the importance of family support and the exploration and removal of unhealthy ideas about shame and emotional problems.

I expect there is still much to learn, and I will have many opportunities to work with Chinese American clients in the future. I would love to sum up some of the things I have learned from my work, though it is difficult since there is certainly no one-size-fits-all rule. With that in mind, here are a few ideas for working with Chinese and Chinese American clients in psychotherapy:
  • Get a sense of the client’s understanding and attitude toward mental disorders in traditional Chinese culture and medicine, stigma associated with mental disorders and emotional concerns, and their understanding of and expectation about psychotherapy.
  • Do not jump to the conclusion that “Chinese don’t trust” or “Chinese don’t talk about feelings.” Some do and some don’t, and it often depends on the situation and setting. Maybe there are unique ways of showing trust, but it may not be readily apparent or expressed verbally; behind that hesitance to open up, if that exists, may be past betrayals to explore, come to terms with, and understand over time. Also, traditionally, silence and not talking about oneself can be seen as a show of respect for authority.
  • Show interest in the client’s acculturation process, e.g., struggles, triumphs, and questions.
  • Find commonalities between you and your client, i.e., interest in Tai Chi or a particular food or movies. This is particularly important with immigrant clients in order to forge a sense of connection and common interests which are assumed in people from the same culture.
  • Build rapport with the client at a pace the client is comfortable with, that is, be sensitive to their pace, be it slower or faster than yours.
  • Case-specific formulation and treatment approaches are crucial regardless of the theoretical approach. Cultural patterns exist among ethnic groups, but the variation among people is still great and quite meaningful to that person.
  • Most importantly, be open and do not assume what a Chinese client will be like; instead focus on entering the room with compassion and genuine curiosity. Don’t be too embarrassed if you don’t know something since this not knowing can actually connect you to the client in a real way.
The more clients I see, the more I realize that people are often more similar than different. Certainly, many of the thoughts I listed above could be applied to my work with clients from other ethnic and cultural backgrounds.


The status of mental health training in China

Epidemiological studies reveal that about 190 million people (in a country of 1.3 billion people) meet the criteria for some type of mental disorder; however, only 10 percent of them receive treatment. In the past several years, there has been increased marketing of mental health practice and training. However, the result is limited and controversial. Since very few universities in China offer coursework in psychotherapy or counseling, the majority of the training is through continuing education programs such as those offered by the Department of Labor’s Mental Health Counseling Program and the German-Chinese Psychotherapy Training Program. These training programs attract trainees from all over China and can be conducted in a mental health center, a university setting, or a privately owned counseling company as long as the program is recognized by a licensing body.

The majority of the licenses offered so far are from the Department of Labor and Social Insurance. Five hundred hours of training will qualify a trainee at a bachelor’s level from any undergraduate field to attend the licensing exam. However, the quality of training and the license are often of great concern and are not necessarily honored by the professional mental health organizations. Currently, once licensed, the counselors are generally not allowed to work in a medical setting. Private practice is also very hard to build as competition is fierce. Medical doctors, especially psychiatrists who have both a medical license from the Chinese Medical Association and the License for Counselor from the Department of Labor, are at a much greater advantage. During the Chinese-German Conference held in Shanghai in May 2007, mental health professionals discussed the current status and strategies for psychological counseling and psychotherapy in China, including more systematic training, establishing licensure examination within the professional organizations, and promoting communication among different disciplines.7

No doubt  there will be many ramifications in the process of professionalism in clinical and counseling psychology in China. For instance, some people raised concerns about the possibility that those licensed through the Department of Labor and Social Insurance would be at a disadvantage and lose their jobs. However, I am optimistic as I believe those who became the first licensed counselors are those who are most sensitive to what is going on in the mental health field and the job market. They also had the courage to take some risks when the outlook was less than clear. They are well positioned to adapt to an ever-changing market and ever-changing system. Indeed, many licensed counselors are seeking further education beyond 500 hours, like my colleague, Ms. Wang, who recently stated: “It is not enough to work with clients with this training. I am seeking opportunities to further my education and training in counseling.”

The future of psychotherapy in China

Currently, training models from various approaches, such as psychodynamic therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, family systems, transactional analysis, and existential all find their way to the mental health training system in China.8 However, it is too early to draw any conclusions regarding what approach works for Chinese at this point before more well-designed research is done. The result may well be the same as in the West: all works, but how much, with whom, and when become the more important questions.

It’s the psychotherapist’s responsibility in China, the US, and around the world to figure out what cultural adaptations to psychotherapy are needed to serve different populations. Even people within the same culture differ hugely (as we know that intra-group difference can be greater than inter-group difference). Case-specific formulation is increasingly emphasized in the West; so too should it be emphasized in the East.

My friend and colleague, Dr. Qi-feng Zeng, the founding president of the Chinese German Psychological Hospital in Wuhan, comforts me with these words: “It is worrisome that it is chaotic in the mental health training system, but we Chinese believe out of great chaos emerges great order!”

With the help and expertise of our Western colleagues in the mental health system in China, and the dedication of a new energetic group of Chinese psychotherapists, I believe a system of psychotherapy will emerge that will better serve Chinese people and contribute to a better understanding of human behavior.

Notes

1 Lewis, M. (1995). Shame: The Exposed Self, New York: The Free Press.

2 Qian, M., Liu, X., & Zhu, R. (March, 2001). Phenomenological research of shame among college students. Chinese Mental Health Journal, Vol 15 (2), 73-75.

3 Lee, S., & Kleinman, A. (2003). Suicide as resistance in Chinese society. In E. Perry & M. Selden (Eds.), Chinese society: Change, conflict, and resistance (2nd ed., pp. 289-311). London: Routledge Curzon.

4 Zhang,Y.,Young, D., Lee, S., Li, L., Zhang, H., Xiao, Z., et al. (2002). Chinese Taoist cognitive psychotherapy in the treatment of generalized anxiety disorder in contemporary China. Transcultural Psychiatry, 39, 115–129.

5 Zhang,Y.,Young, et al.

6 Gallagher-Thompson, D., Gray, HL., Tang, PC., Pu, CY., Leung, LY., Wang, P-Ch., Tse,C., Hsu, S., Kwo, E., Tong, HQ., Long, J., & Thompson, L. (2007). Impact of in-home behavioral management versus telephone support to reduce depressive symptoms and perceived stress in Chinese caregivers: results of a pilot study. American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry, Vol. 15(5), p 425-434.

7 Xiao, Z. P. (2007). The current situations and strategies for psychological counseling and psychotherapy in China. Presented at the Chinese-German Congress on Psychotherapy, May, 2007.

Chang, D.F., Tong, H.Q., Shi, Q.J., & Zeng, Q.F. (2005). Letting a hundred flowers bloom: Counseling and psychotherapy in the People’s Republic of ChinaJournal of Mental Health Counseling. Special issue: Counseling Around the World, Vol 27 (2) 104-116.

Suggested readings

Xue, Xinran (2002). The good women of China. Vintage Publishing.

DK Publishing (2007). China: People Place Culture History. DK Publishing.

Resistant Clients: We’ve All Had Them; Here’s How to Help Them!

If you inwardly cringe when a client becomes resistant to the counseling or psychotherapy you're providing, take heart. Encountering resistance is likely evidence that therapy is taking place. In fact, several studies indicate that successful therapy is highly related to increases in resistance, and that low resistance corresponds with negative outcomes.1 There is an upper level of resistance (too much) as well as a lower level of resistance (too little) that are counterproductive. Getting to moderate levels of resistance is important to successful therapy, especially when followed by effective approaches and techniques.

The most effective therapists are prepared to encounter their clients' resistance—they know how to deal with it, and how to help their clients break through it. They do this by understanding what resistance represents psychologically, and they have developed a way of conceptualizing and reacting to the resistance that allows them to remain emotionally comfortable or centered.

We can deal with highly resistant clients effectively when we:

  1. learn to avoid common errors that unnecessarily create or foster resistance;
  2. recognize when resistance has gotten the better of us; and
  3. are able to consider the positive side of resistance.

Resistance has been defined from a number of perspectives. Traditional definitions have their roots in Freudian theory and usually place resistance inside the client. Such definitions view resistance as representing the client's efforts to repress anxiety-provoking memories and insights, or efforts to fight the therapist's influence. For example, Bischoff & Tracey define resistance as "any behavior that indicates covert or overt opposition to the therapist, the counseling process, or the therapist's agenda." Although common, such perspectives leave therapists lacking control and too much at the mercy of other influences when attempting to foster change.

The social interaction theorists view resistance as being the result of a ''negative interpersonal dynamic between the therapist and the client."2 Here, resistance is seen as something that results from the interactional style of the therapist and the client. The therapist allows the client to form a mutual communication pattern that hinders counseling and the change process. “The interactional view of resistance forces the therapist to remain aware of what he or she may be doing that actually promotes resistance.” The great benefit of this perspective is that changing your interaction style results in changing what has been deemed resistance. This perspective empowers therapists in managing resistance in therapy.

Whose Goal Are You Working On?

When we experience resistance, we say that the client is "not going anywhere." We feel stuck. Central to these statements is the question: Where is the client supposed to be going? The client is showing no progress toward what? One of the primary therapist errors that causes resistance is failure to establish a mutually agreed-upon objective. If you and your client are not in agreement about a desired outcome, problems are inevitable. Furthermore, you and your client should be able to clearly state the mutually agreed-upon objective. If a mutually agreed-upon objective has not been established and reasonable time has been devoted to establishing rapport and understanding the client's situation, then it is critical to focus session time on the creation of such an objective.

The next time one of your colleagues complains to you about a particularly difficult client who does not want to change, ask them, "What is the goal?" If they begin stuttering or go into a vague, rambling explanation, you will know that a mutually agreed-upon goal has not been established. Then inquire, "If your client was asked what the goal is, would the client's response agree with what you just stated?" It is mind-boggling how many times this essential therapeutic component is not properly formulated.

Such goals do not have to be complex. For example, a simple goal may be for the client to spend at least 15 minutes each day in a discussion with their partner about their day before any other activities are begun. Another could be for the client to plan one night a week where they do an activity together with their partner. Such goals could be smaller components of an overall objective to increase communication and connection in the relationship.

The Who, Where, and When of it All

We are not helpful to our clients until we have reached a point where problems can be defined around a specific person, place, and time. David Burns, author of Feeling Good, taught me this concept and I have yet to prove it wrong. Sometimes the person, place, and time are obvious—e.g. a spouse at home, when the children need disciplining; or a boss, previously dealt with at work, in the past. Or maybe the problem is the client's traumatic experience at an earlier age with a family member. Sometimes it is the client and you, dealing with the conflict, at the present moment in the session!

Regardless of the case specifics, the person, place, and time components are present in solvable problems. Being clear on the person, place, and time of your client's problem brings clarity to the process and avoids ambiguity that hinders progress. For example, a client who enters therapy with a goal to "not be nervous" has yet to reach a point in problem clarity where help can be provided. The brief therapists would say that this problem has not been defined in manner that makes it solvable. As a result of the therapeutic discussion, such a vaguely defined problem would be transformed into a more specific goal such as to be "calm, relaxed, and assertive when discussing needed changes in the department with the boss." With this level of specificity, the definitive steps can be taken toward resolution. Skilled therapists most often move the discussion to a level of specificity almost without conscious awareness. However, clarity in understanding the essential elements of solvable problems can enhance the process. It is also quite helpful for beginning therapists who have difficulty figuring out exactly what they are trying to do.

When the Solutions are Terrifying

We all know the familiar axiom that our clients have the solution to their problem inside, and that it's our job to help them find it. What experienced therapists know is that “one of the main reasons clients come to therapy is not because they don't know the solution to their problem, but because they find the solutions terrifying.” From this perspective, one of the therapist's primary jobs is to normalize the fears surrounding the solution and support the client's courage to move forward in the midst of the perceived impending terror. In cases where fear of the solution is great, focusing too strongly on the solution may increase fear. In such instances, focus on dealing with the fear that accompanies the solution before moving the focus forward toward actions to be taken.

For example, I once counseled a woman who repeatedly discussed how much she hated her husband and how badly she wanted a divorce, but she was not proceeding with the divorce. As we addressed the issues further, we discovered she was filled with fear about the divorce—fear because she and her children were financially dependent on her husband, fear because she felt she had no marketable job skills, fear because returning to school for training was costly and scary. At this point the counseling session changed from focusing on whether she should divorce to the more pressing issue—addressing the fear that accompanied the divorce.

The Columbo Technique

An interesting paradox occurs with highly resistant clients. The greater the resistance, the more likely it is that they are refusing to consider any of a host of possible solutions. Typically, as we become aware of the myriad possible solutions to a client's problems, we become more certain that our knowledge can help them. As a result of such certainty, we begin talking more and more as an expert regarding the problem at hand.

But here's the catch: The more of an expert you become, the more you give the client something definitive to resist against and the less psychological freedom clients have to explore possibilities on their own. “Thus, being too knowledgeable about obvious solutions may actually create resistance.” A sure sign that you have become too much of an expert is getting, "Yes, but …" answers.

The way out of this situation is to reverse the paradox. The more obvious possible solutions become, the more naïve, inexperienced and uncertain your displayed attitude toward these solutions should be. The principle at work here is that your client cannot be resistant if there is nothing to resist. My students have dubbed this approach the Columbo technique because it is similar to the approach taken by fumbling television detective Columbo as he hoodwinked his suspects into revealing key information necessary to solving murders. “Columbo apprehended his suspect by constantly appearing to not understand the basic components surrounding the murder and by asking questions that forced the suspect to clarify his or her actions.” Although Columbo always appeared to be two steps behind the murderer, in reality he was two steps ahead.

A therapist I know explained to me that he used to get sucked into lecturing, argumentative discussions with alcoholic clients that expounded to them the many reasons not to drink. After reading my book, he says that he now avoids such vain, pointless conversations. Recently, in a first session with an alcoholic client, he inquired as to the client's reasons for drinking. Expecting a flood of reasons not to drink as a response, the client proceeded to build a case for drinking in which he explained how drinking help him to relax, deal with stress, manage his chronic pain, etc. After hearing the strong case for drinking, the therapists stated that he had no knowledge of any pill or therapeutic discussion that could substitute for the benefits received from continuing to drink. Almost immediately the client began to state something to the effect, "But, you don't understand, I have a fifty-dollar-a-week alcohol bill that I can't afford, my wife is threatening to leave me, my kids don't respect me, and I really don't like myself for drinking." In this instance, in order not to provide something to resist against and avoid the typical "Yes, but…" response, this therapist selectively became uncertain and naïve as to any solutions to the drinking problem.

By becoming naïve to the obvious, he quickly received from the client motivations to stop drinking, and the discussion proceeded from there. My therapist friend explained to me that, in similar situations in the past, he would have immediately provided information and knowledge for the client to resist against. However, he has since become much wiser and goes to great lengths to avoid providing a position for his resistant clients to oppose.

Is Rogers Still Right?

Many experienced therapists become lax in consistently showing empathy throughout their sessions. When we conduct sessions excessively loaded with questions without a foundation of understanding, our clients lose the feeling of psychological support necessary for them to proceed safely. An essential component to breaking through resistance is maintaining a foundation of understanding through a dialogue that engages the client's experience with empathic comments.

An equally important reason to consistently use empathic statements is to get clients in touch with the emotional energy they need in order to initiate change. “People rarely change because of the logic of the situation; people change when they have an emotionally compelling reason.” Yet, because emotions are often linked to uncomfortable feelings, clients have blocked awareness of or are in denial of their own emotions. Empathy is the tool that fosters the emergence of emotionally compelling reasons for change, and thus it ignites and fans the fires of change.

For example, I have often dealt with people who desire to quit smoking. One of the things I have learned is that people very rarely quit smoking because of the possibility for cancer, emphysema, heart attacks, bad breath, high costs, etc. People do quit when these issues directly affect them as a result of a medical checkup or in some other manner. I once worked with a man who wanted to quit smoking, where I initially struggled to get to the underlying emotional reason behind this life change. He appeared reluctant to offer up or get in touch with the real reason for breaking the habit. However, through continuing to respond in an empathic manner and to pull to the forefront all of the emotions I was sensing, I struck gold when I indicated that I sensed he was a very responsible person who cared for children. From this revelation, the underlying force for his habit change emerged in the conversation: His wife was pregnant! He was going to be a father! Now, he had an emotionally compelling reason to change. Therapists seeking to mine the compelling reasons for change should consistently use empathic statements that include specific reference to the emotions present. This is the most efficient avenue to discovering the emotionally compelling reasons that fuel the desire to change.

Baby Steps are No Joke

A considerable amount of resistance comes from poor timing. If you find that you are offering explanations before the client is ready to accept them, confronting the client too soon or moving too fast, then slow your pace, back up, and take smaller steps. Therapy is clearly one area of life where it pays to slow down to go faster. In fact, taking small steps is often a central part of effective therapy, including brief therapy.

In order to not rush your client, I suggest you constantly ask yourself, "What could I say that might move my client the smallest step possible toward where they need to be to resolve their problem?" This approach solves two problems for the therapist. First, it does not push the client and thereby create resistance. In fact, “if you slow down to the point that you are behind your client, then you can actually have the client pulling you along toward their solution.” Second, this approach takes an enormous amount of pressure off of you. The task at hand becomes manageable, and you will find that you are more able to remain balanced in sessions. Learning and practicing this skill can be an enormous stress reducer for therapists.

For example, to ask a person in denial over the loss of a loved one to fully accept the loss may be too threatening or inconceivable to them. This is simply too big of a step to take at the moment. To ask the same client to come up with ways to honor their loved one in his or her absence will likely appear much more palatable. In this way, perhaps some of the underlying emotions related to loss, meaning, closure, guilt, etc. can begin to be addressed. By suggesting smaller, more acceptable steps in moving through the grieving process, the therapist circumvents the resistance that the client would have experienced as a result of moving too fast toward closure.

Recognizing When Resistance Has the Upper Hand

Significant client resistance leaves psychotherapists feeling insecure, incompetent, frustrated, hopeless, stressed, and burnt out. When these feelings are indirectly communicated to clients, more resistance occurs and a negative spiral develops. Less-experienced burnt-out therapists are most vulnerable to the negative effects of resistance. One of the keys to dealing with resistance is to recognize that resistance is not personal. Resistance is a fact of therapy.

Watch for signs that resistance has gotten the better of you:

  • You feel like you are fighting or arguing with your client. Many times you may have felt like you were trying to convince your client of something and were not making headway.
  • You feel stressed and drained in an unhealthy manner after a session.
  • You are working harder in your session than your client is. If, after finishing your sessions, you have more work to do than your client, then you should take a close look at what you are doing. Something is likely amiss.
  • You are feeling burnt out with your work.

Typically, resistance conjures up ideas of stubbornness, obstinacy, and defiance. Beware! Once you place these labels on your client, you are generally just as stuck as your client. To avoid getting stuck, you may want to consider other perspectives on resistance.

Some possible dynamics of resistance

  • Resistance may be a reflection of the developmental level of your client.
  • Resistance may be a signal that the client is dealing with a very important issue that has multiple conflicts.
  • Resistance may be a result of the way the therapist and the client interact. Consequently, changing your interaction style will change the resistance.

(See Something Besides Stubbornness below for other reasons a client might be resistant.)

The Plus Side of Client Resistance

To fully understand resistance, the many positive benefits of resistance need to be examined. Resistance has a purpose; otherwise, it would not exist. When we understand the many benefits of resistance, we begin to realize that it is just as essential to mental health as it is a problem in therapy. The following purposes and benefits of resistance are compiled from the writings of Anderson and Steward.3

  • Without resistance, all social systems would dissolve into chaos and confusion, changing with every new idea presented.
  • Resistance is what prevents us from buying every product presented to us in commercials and infomercials.
  • Without a certain amount of resistance, we would have no stability, predictability, security, or comfort.
  • Resistance provides us with a sense of being right. Can there be a sense of right and wrong without an awareness of the opposition of one position against another, or without a resistance to certain positions?
  • Resistance can be a sign of good mental health and judgment; people often want new alternatives to problems before giving up old ways.
  • Understanding resistance—including its possible positive purposes—and knowing effective means for dealing with resistance is not merely intellectual enrichment. This knowledge can reduce therapist stress and burnout.
  • Resistance in therapy is a natural, necessary part of every client's problem. It is neither good nor bad, and the effective therapist neither abandons, rescues, nor attacks clients because of their resistance.
  • Resistance is the problem at hand. Many clients are ambivalent about change, and the decisions they make are typically not clear-cut—that's why they have come to therapy.
  • People resist difficult change because of the underlying conflicts. The therapist's job is to provide an environment where internal conflicts can be addressed.

When we have a plan for dealing with resistance before we encounter it in therapy, we won't get trapped in a futile battle with our clients. Instead, we will be able to remain objective and have a clear perspective about what is occurring. Hopefully some of the techniques for responding to resistance that I've suggested here will help you with resistant clients and keep yourself grounded in the process.

And if you find yourself feeling discouraged by resistant clients, think about this: Which is more troubling: a client who does everything you suggest, or one who takes time to assimilate and adjust to new ideas? Or if that idea doesn't buoy your spirits, then consider the following: "Without resistance, we would all be out of a job."4

Resistance: Something Besides Stubbornness?

Have you considered any of the following reasons clients might be resistant to therapy? Resistance could be a sign of:

Fear of failure. Client does not know how to be a client and has a high need for success or perfectionism and thus resists as a result of the fear of failure.

Fear of taking risks. Client sees counseling as a highly risky behavior and client is actually very conservative in his or her life approach.

Manipulation. The client enjoys manipulating others and, by not "moving" or responding therapeutically, they experience power in recognizing that they can manipulate the therapist.

Passive-aggressive behavior. Client is angry with the therapist or some other adult/authority that the therapist represents (transference). The resistance could be a reaction to authority figures in general.

Shame. The client may have feelings of shame because he or she has not been able to resolve the issues or because of the social implications of the issues.

Jealousy or desire to sabotage the therapy relationship. "If I get better, then I will not be able to come to these sessions and get all of this attention and maintain my relationship with my therapist." In this instance, an unhealthy dependence has developed between the client and therapist.

Exhaustion. Resistance could be an indication that the client is psychologically drained and does not have the energy to take on the tasks that will lead to change. Here, the therapist needs to back off and allow for replenishing of energy. Take a therapeutic break.

A personality style. Many people instinctively respond to change with resistance.

A client who enjoys resisting. Some people simply enjoy the battle of resisting, the stimulation of arguing, and controversy long beyond the initial reaction to change. These people often switch positions if they find others agreeing with them to keep the stimulation going (Kottler, 1994).

References

1Bischoff, M. M., & Tracey, T. J. G. (1995). Client resistance as predicted by therapist behavior: A study of sequential dependence. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 42(4), 487-495.

2Otani, A. (1989). Resistance management techniques of Milton H. Erickson, M.D.: An application to nonhypnotic mental health counseling. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 11(4), 325-334.

3Anderson, C. M., & Stewart, S. (1983). Mastering resistance: A practical guide to family therapy. New York: The Guilford Press.

4Pipes, R. B., & Davenport, D. S. (1990). Introduction to psychotherapy: Common Clinical wisdom. New Jersey: Prentice Hall.

Supershrinks: What is the secret of their success?

Clients of the best therapists improve at a rate at least 50 percent higher and drop out at a rate at least 50 percent lower than those of average clinicians. What is the key to superior performance? Are "supershrinks" made or born? Is it a matter of temperament or training? Have they discovered a secret unknown to other clinicians or are their superior results simply a fluke, more measurement error than reality? We know that who provides the therapy is a much more important determinant of success than what treatment approach is provided. The age, gender, and diagnosis of the client have no impact on the treatment success rate, nor do the experience, training, and theoretical orientation of the therapist. In attempting to answer these questions, Miller, Hubble and Duncan, have found that the best of the best simply work harder at improving their performance than others and attentiveness to feedback is crucial. When a measure of the alliance is used with a standardized outcome scale, available evidence shows clients are less likely to deteriorate, more likely to stay longer, and twice as likely to achieve a change of clinical significance.

The boisea trivittatus, better known as the box elder bug, emerges from the recesses of homes and dwellings in early spring. While feared neither for its bite nor sting, most people consider the tiny insect a pest. The critter comes out by the thousands, resting in the sun and staining upholstery and draperies with its orange-colored wastes. Few find it endearing, with the exception perhaps of entomologists. It doesn't purr and won't fetch the morning paper. What is more, you will be sorry if you step on it. When crushed, the diminutive creature emits a putrid odor worthy of an animal many times its size.

For as long as anyone could remember, boisea trivittatus was an unwelcome yet familiar guest in the offices and waiting area of a large Midwestern, multicounty community mental health center. Professional exterminators did their best to keep the bugs at bay, but inevitably many eluded the efforts to eliminate them. Tissues were placed strategically throughout the center for staff and clients to dispatch the escapees. In time, the arrangement became routine. Out of necessity, everyone tolerated the annual annoyance—with one notable exception.

Dawn, a 12-year veteran of the center, led the resistance to what she considered "insecticide." In a world turned against the bugs, she was their only ally. To save the tiny beasts, she collected and distributed old mason jars, imploring others to catch the little critters so that she could release them safely outdoors.

Few were surprised by Dawn's regard for the bugs. Most people who knew her would have characterized her as a holdout from the "Summer of Love." Her VW microbus, floor-length tie-dyed skirts, and Birkenstock sandals—combined with the scent of patchouli and sandalwood that lingered after her passage—solidified everyone's impression that she was a fugitive of Haight-Ashbury. Rumor had it that she'd been conceived at Esalen.

Despite these eccentricities, Dawn was hands-down the most effective therapist at the agency. This finding was established through a tightly controlled, research-to-practice study conducted at her agency. As part of this study of success rates in actual clinical settings, Dawn and her colleagues administered a standardized measure of progress to each client at every session.

What made her performance all the more compelling was that Dawn was the top performer seven years running. Moreover, factors widely believed to affect treatment outcome—the client's age, gender, diagnosis, level of functional impairment, or prior treatment history—did not affect her results. Other factors not correlated with her outcomes were her age, gender, training, professional discipline, licensure, or years of experience. Even her theoretical orientation proved inconsequential.

Contrast Dawn with Gordon, who could not have been more different. Rigidly conservative and brimming with confidence bordering on arrogance, Gordon managed to build a thriving private practice in an area where most practitioners were struggling to stay afloat financially. Many in the professional community sought to emulate his success. In the hopes of learning his secrets or earning his acknowledgment, they competed hard to become part of his inner circle.

Whispered conversations at parties and local professional meetings made clear that others regarded Gordon with envy and enmity. "Profits talk, patients walk," was one comment that captured the general feeling about him. And the critics could not have been more wrong. The people Gordon saw in his practice regarded him as caring and deeply committed to their welfare. Furthermore, he achieved outcomes that were far superior to those of the clinicians who carped about him. In fact, the same measures that confirmed Dawn's superior results placed Gordon in the top 25 percent of psychotherapists studied in the United States.

In 1974, researcher D. F. Ricks coined the term supershrink to describe a class of exceptional therapists—practitioners who stood head and shoulders above the rest. His study examined the long-term outcomes of "highly disturbed" adolescents. When the research participants were later examined as adults, he found that a select group, treated by one particular provider, fared notably better. In the same study, boys treated by the pseudoshrink demonstrated alarmingly poor adjustment as adults.

The fact that therapists differ in their ability to effect change is hardly a revelation. All of us have participated in hushed conversations about colleagues whose performance we feel falls short of the mark. We also recognize that some practitioners are a cut above the rest. With rare exceptions, whenever they take aim, they hit the bull's-eye. Nevertheless, since Ricks's first description, little has been done to further the investigation of super- and pseudoshrinks. Instead, professional time, energy, and resources have been directed exclusively toward identifying effective therapies. Trying to identify specific interventions that could be dispensed reliably for specific problems has a strong common-sense appeal. No one would argue with the success of the idea of problem-specific interventions in the field of medicine. But the evidence is incontrovertible. “Who provides the therapy is a much more important determinant of success than what treatment approach is provided.”

Consider a recent study conducted by Bruce Wampold and Jeb Brown in 2006 and published in the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. Briefly, the study included 581 licensed providers, including psychologists, psychiatrists, and master's-level providers, who were treating a diverse sample of over 6,000 clients. The therapists, the clientele, and the presenting complaints were not different in any meaningful way from clinical settings nationwide. As was the case with Dawn and Gordon, the clients' age, gender, and diagnosis had no impact on the treatment success rate and neither did the experience, training, or theoretical orientation of the therapists. However, clients of the best therapists in the sample improved at a rate at least 50 percent higher and dropped out at a rate at least 50 percent lower than those assigned to the average clinicians in the sample.

Another important finding emerged: in those cases in which psychotropic medication was combined with psychotherapy, the drugs did not perform consistently. As with talk therapy, effectiveness depended on who prescribed the drug. People seen by top providers achieved gains from the drugs 10 times greater than those seen by the less effective practitioners. Among the latter group, the drugs virtually made no difference. So, in the chemistry of mental health treatment, orientations, techniques, and even medications are inert. The clinician is the catalyst.

The making of a Supershrink

For the past eight years the Institute for the Study of Therapeutic Change (ISTC), an international group of researchers and clinicians dedicated to studying what works in psychotherapy, has been tracking the outcomes of thousands of therapists treating tens of thousands of clients in myriad clinical settings across the United States and abroad. Like D. F. Ricks and other researchers, we found wide variations in effectiveness among practicing clinicians. Intrigued, we decided to try to determine why.

We began our investigation by looking at the research literature. The Institute has earned its reputation in part by reviewing research and publishing summaries and critical analyses on its website (www.talkingcure.com). We were well aware at the outset that little had been done since D. F. Rick's original paper to deepen the understanding of super- and pseudoshrinks. Nevertheless, a massive amount of research had been conducted on what in general makes therapists and therapy effective. When we attempted to determine the characteristics of the most effective practitioners using our national database, with the hypothesis that therapists like Dawn and Gordon must simply do or embody more of "it," we smacked head-first into a brick wall. Neither the person of the therapist, nor technical prowess, separated the best from the rest.

Frustrated, but undeterred, we retraced our steps. Maybe we had missed something, a critical study, a nuance, a finding that would steer us in the right direction. We returned to our own database to take a second look, reviewing the numbers and checking the analyses. We asked consultants outside the Institute to verify our computations. We invited others to brainstorm possible explanations. Opinions varied from many of the factors we had already considered and ruled out to "it's all a matter of chance, noise in the system, more statistical artifact than fact." Put another way, supershrinks were not real and their emergence in any data analysis was entirely random. In the end, there was nothing we could point to that explained why some clinicians achieved consistently superior results. Seeing no solution, we gave up and turned our attention elsewhere.

The project would have remained shelved indefinitely had one of us not stumbled on the work of Swedish psychologist K. Anders Ericsson. Nearly two years had passed since we had given up. Then Scott, returning to the U.S. after providing a week of training in Norway, stumbled on an article published in Fortune magazine. Weary from the road and frankly bored, he had taken the periodical from the passing flight attendant more for the glossy pictures and factoids than for intellectual stimulation. In short order, however, the magazine title seized his attention—in big bold letters, "What it takes to be great." The subtitle cinched it, "Research now shows that the lack of natural talent is irrelevant to great success." Although the lead article itself was a mere four pages in length, the content kept him occupied for the remaining eight hours of the flight.

Ericsson, Scott learned, was considered to be "the expert on experts." For the better part of two decades, he had studied the world's best athletes, authors, chess players, dart throwers, mathematicians, pianists, teachers, pilots, physicians, and others. He was also a bit of a maverick. In a world prone to attribute greatness to genetic endowment, Ericsson did not mince words, "The search for stable heritable characteristics that could predict or at least account for superior performance of eminent individuals [in sports, chess, music, medicine, etc.] has been surprisingly unsuccessful . . . Systematic laboratory research . . . provides no evidence for giftedness or innate talent."

Should Ericsson's bold and sweeping claims prove difficult to believe, take the example of Michael Jordan, regarded widely as the greatest basketball player of all time. When asked, most would cite natural advantages in height, reach, and leap as key to his success. Notwithstanding, few know that "His Airness" was cut from his high school varsity basketball team! So much for the idea of being born great. It simply does not work that way.

“The key to superior performance? As absurd as it sounds, the best of the best simply work harder at improving their performance than others.” Jordan, for example, did not give up when thrown off the team. Instead, his failure drove him to the courts, where he practiced hour after hour. As he put it, "Whenever I was working out and got tired and figured I ought to stop, I'd close my eyes and see that list in the locker room without my name on it, and that usually got me going again."

“As time consuming as this level of practice sounds—and it is—it isn't enough. According to Ericsson, to reach the top level, attentiveness to feedback is crucial.”

Such deliberate practice, as Ericsson goes to great lengths to point out, isn't the same as the number of hours spent on the job, but rather the amount of time devoted specifically to reaching for objectives "just beyond one's level of proficiency." He chides anyone who believes that experience creates expertise, saying, "Just because you've been walking for 50 years doesn't mean you're getting better at it." Of interest, he and his group have found that elite performers across many different domains engage in the same amount of such practice, on average, every day, including weekends. In a study of 20-year-old musicians, for example, Ericsson and colleagues found that the top violinists spent twice  as much time (10,000 hours on average) working to meet specific performance targets as the next best players and 10 times as much time as the average musician.

“As time consuming as this level of practice sounds—and it is—it is not enough. According to Ericsson, to reach the top level, attentiveness to feedback is crucial.” Studies of physicians with an uncanny ability to diagnose baffling medical problems, for example, prove that they act differently than their less capable, but equally well-trained, colleagues. In addition to visiting, examining, taking careful notes, and reflecting on their assessment of a particular patient, they take one additional critical step. They follow up. Unlike their "proficient" peers, they do not settle. Call it professional compulsiveness or pride, these physicians need to know whether they were right, even though finding out is not required nor reimbursable. "This extra step," Ericsson says, gives the superdiagnostician"a significant advantage over his peers. It lets him better understand how and when he's improving."

Within days of touching down, Scott had shared Ericsson's findings with Mark and Barry. An intellectual frenzy followed. Articles were pulled, secondary references tracked down, and Ericsson's 918-page Cambridge Handbook of Expertise and Expert Performance purchased and read cover to cover. In the process, our earlier confusion gave way to understanding. With considerable chagrin, we realized that what therapists per se do is irrelevant to greatness. The path to excellence would never be found by limiting our explorations to the world of psychotherapy, with its attendant theories, tools, and techniques. Instead, we needed to redirect our attention to superior performance, regardless of calling or career.

Knowing what you don't know

Ericsson's work on practice and feedback also explained the studies that show how most of us grow continually in confidence over the course of our careers, despite little or no improvement in our actual rates of success. Hard to believe but true. On this score, the experience of psychologist Paul Clement is telling. Throughout his years of practice, he kept unusually thorough records of his work with clients, detailing hundreds of cases falling into 84 different diagnostic categories. "I had expected to find," he said in a quantitative analysis published in the peer-reviewed journal Professional Psychology, "that I had gotten better and better over the years . . . but my data failed to suggest any . . . change in my therapeutic effectiveness across the 26 years in question."

Contrary to conventional wisdom, the culprit behind such mistaken self-assessment is not incompetence, but rather proficiency. Within weeks and months of first starting out, noticeable mistakes in everyday professional activities become increasingly rare, and thereby make intentional modifications seem irrelevant, increasingly difficult, and costly in time and resources. Once more, this is human nature, a process that dogs every profession. Add to this the custom in our profession of conflating success with a particular method or technique, and the door to greatness for many therapists is slammed shut early on.

During the last few decades, for example, more than 10,000 "how-to" books on psychotherapy have been published. At the same time, the number of treatment approaches has mushroomed, going from around 60 in the early days to more than 400 psychological treatment models today. At present, there are 145 officially approved, manualized, evidence-based treatments for 51 of the 397 possible DSM diagnostic groups. Based on these numbers alone, one would be hard pressed to not believe that real progress has been made by the field. More than ever before, we know what works for whom. Or do we?

Comparing the success rates of today with those of 10, 20, or 30 years ago is one way to find out. One would expect that the profession is progressing in a manner comparable to the Olympics. Fans know that during the last century, the best performance for every event has improved—in some cases, by as much as 50 percent. What is more, excellence at the top has had a trickle-down effect, improving performance at every level. For example, the fastest time clocked for the marathon in the 1896 Olympics was just one minute faster than the time that is required now just to participate in the most competitive marathons like Boston and Chicago. By contrast, no measurable improvement in the effectiveness of psychotherapy has occurred in the last 30 years.

The time has come to confront the unpleasant truth: our tried-and-true strategies for improving what we do have failed. Instead of advancing as a field, we have stagnated, mistaking our feverish peddling on a stationary bicycle for progress in the Tour de Therapy. This is not to say that therapy is ineffective. Quite to the contrary, the data are clear and unequivocal: psychotherapy works. Studies conducted over the last three decades show effects equal to or greater than those achieved by a host of well-accepted medical procedures, such as coronary artery bypass surgery, the pharmacological treatment of arthritis, and AZT for AIDS. At issue, however, is how we can learn from our experiences and "improve" our rate of success, both as a discipline and in our individual practices.

Incidentally, psychotherapists are not alone in this struggle to increase our expertise. During our survey of the literature on greatness, we came across an engaging and provocative article published in the New Yorker magazine. Using the treatment of cystic fibrosis (CF) as an example, science writer Atul Gawande showed how the same processes that undermine excellence in psychotherapy play out in medicine. Since 1964, medical researchers have been tracking the outcomes of patients with CF, a genetic disease striking 1,000 children yearly. The disease is progressive and, over time, mucus fills, hardens, and eventually destroys the lungs.

As is the case with psychotherapy, the evidence indicates that standard CF treatment works. With medical intervention, life expectancy is on average 33 years; without care, few patients survive infancy. The real story, as Gawande points out, is not that patients with CF live longer when treated, but that, as with psychotherapy, there is a significant variation in treatment success rates. At the best treatment centers, survival rates are 50 percent higher than the national average, meaning that patients live to be 47 on average.

Such differences, however, have not been achieved through standardization of care and the top-down imposition of the "best" practices. Indeed, Cincinnati Children's Hospital (CCH), one of the nation's most respected treatment centers—which employs two of the physicians responsible for preparing the national CF treatment guidelines—produced only average to poor outcomes. In fact, on one of the most critical measures, lung functioning, this institution scored in the bottom 25 percent.

It is a small comfort to know that our counterparts in medicine, a field celebrated routinely for its scientific rigor, stumble and fall just as much as we "soft-headed" psychotherapists do in the pursuit of excellence. But Gawande's article, available for free at the Institute for Healthcare Improvement website (www.ihi.org), provides so much more than an opportunity to commiserate. His piece confirms what our own research revealed to be the essential first step in improving outcomes: knowing your baseline performance. It just stands to reason. If you call a friend for directions, her first question will be, "Where are you?" The same is true of RandMcNally, Yahoo! and every other online mapping service. To get where you want to go, you first have to know where you are—a fact the clinical staff at CCH put to good use.

In truth, most practicing psychotherapists have no hard data on their success rates with clients. Fewer still have any idea how their outcomes compare to those of other clinicians or to national norms. Unlike therapists, though, the staff at CCH not only determined their overall rate of effectiveness, they were able to compare their success rates with other major CF treatment centers across the country. With such information in hand, the medical staff acted to push beyond their current standard of reliable performance. In time, their outcomes improved markedly.

A formula for success

Turning to specifics, the truth is we have yet to discover how supershrinks like Dawn and Gordon ascertain their baseline. Our experience leads us to believe that they do not know either. What is clear is that their appraisal, intuitive though it may be, is more accurate than that of average practitioners. It is likely, and our analysis thus far confirms, that the methods they employ will prove to be highly variable, defying any simple attempt at classification. Despite such differences in approach, the supershrinks without exception possess a keen "situational awareness": they are observant, alert and attentive. They constantly compare new information with what they already know.

For the rest of us mere mortals, a shortcut to supershrinkdom exists. It entails using simple paper and pencil scales and some basic statistics to compute your baseline, a process we discuss in detail in what follows. In the end, you may not become the Frank Sinatra, Tiger Woods, or Melissa Etheridge of the therapy world, but you will be able to sing, swing and strum along with the best.

“The prospect of knowing one's true rate of success can provoke anxiety even in the best of us. For all that, studies of working clinicians provide little reason for concern.” To illustrate, the outcomes reported in a recent study of 6,000 practitioners and 48,000 clients were as good as or better than those typically reported in tightly controlled studies. These findings are especially notable because clinicians, unlike researchers, do not have the luxury of handpicking the clients they treat. Most clinicians do good work most of the time, and do so while working with complex, difficult cases.

At the same time, you should not be surprised or disheartened when your results prove to be average. As with height, weight, and intelligence, success rates of therapists are normally distributed, resembling the all-too-familiar bell curve. It is a fact, in nearly all facets of life, most of us are clustered tightly around the mean. As the research by Hiatt and Hargrave shows, a more serious problem is when therapists do not know how they are performing or, worse, think they know their effectiveness without outside confirmation.

Unfortunately, our own work with regard to tracking the outcomes of thousands of therapists working in diverse clinical settings has exposed a consistent and alarming pattern: those who are the slowest to adopt a valid and reliable procedure to establish their baseline performance typically have the poorest outcomes of the lot.

Should any doubt remain with regard to the value and importance of determining one's overall rate of success, let us underscore that the mere act of measuring yields improved outcomes. In fact, it is the first and among the most potent forms of feedback available to clinicians seeking excellence. Several recent studies, demonstrate convincingly that monitoring client progress on an ongoing basis improves effectiveness dramatically. Our own study published last year in the Journal of Brief Therapy found that providing therapists with real time feedback improved outcome nearly 65 percent. No downside exists to determining your baseline effectiveness. One either is proven effective or becomes more effective in the process.

There is more good news on this score. Share your baseline—good, bad, or average—with clients and the results are even more dramatic. Dropouts, the single greatest threat to therapeutic success, are cut in half. At the same time, outcomes improve yet again, in particular among those at greatest risk for treatment failure. Cincinnati Children's Hospital provides a case in point. Although surprised and understandably embarrassed about their overall poor national ranking, the medical staff nonetheless resolved to share the results with the patients and families. Contrary to what might have been predicted, not a single family chose to leave the program.

That everyone decided to remain committed rather than bolt should really come as no surprise. Across all types of relationships—business, family and friendship, medicine—success depends less on a connection during the good times than on maintaining engagement through the inevitable hard times. The fact the CCH staff shared the information about their poor performance increased the connection their patients felt with them and enhanced their engagement. It is no different in psychotherapy. Where we as therapists have the most impact on securing and sustaining engagement is through the relationship with our clients, what is commonly referred to as the "alliance." When it works well, client and therapist reach and maintain agreement about where they are going and the means by which they will get there. Equally important is the strength of the emotional connection—the bond.

Supershrinks, as our own research shows, are exquisitely attuned to the vicissitudes of client engagement. In what amounts to a quantum difference between themselves and average therapists, they are more likely to ask for and receive negative feedback about the quality of the work and their contribution to the alliance. We have now confirmed this finding in numerous independent samples of practitioners working in diverse settings with a wide range of presenting problems. The best clinicians, those falling in the top 25 percent of treatment outcomes, consistently achieve lower scores on standardized alliance measures at the outset of therapy, enabling them to address potential problems in the working relationship. By contrast, median therapists commonly receive negative feedback later in treatment, at a time when clients have already disengaged and are at heightened risk for dropping out.

How do the supershrinks use feedback with regard to the alliance to maintain engagement? A session conducted by Dawn, rescuer of the box elder bugs, is representative of the work done by the field's most effective practitioners. At the time of the visit, we were working as consultants to her agency, teaching the staff to use the standardized outcome and alliance scales, and observing selected clinical interviews from behind a one-way mirror. She had been meeting with an elderly man for the better part of an hour. Although the session initially had lurched along, an easy give and take soon developed between the two. Everyone watching agreed that, overall, the session had gone remarkably well.

At this point, Dawn gave the alliance measure to the client, saying "This is the scale I told you about at the beginning of our visit. It's something new we're doing here. It's a way for me to check in, to get your feedback or input about what we did here today."

Without comment, the man took the form, and after quickly completing it, handed it back to Dawn.

"Ohm wow," she remarked, after rapidly scoring the measure, "you've given me, or the session at least, the highest marks possible."

With that, everyone behind the one-way mirror began to stir in their chairs. Each of us was expecting Dawn to wrap up the session—even, it appeared, the client who was inching forward on his chair. Instead, she leaned toward him.

"I'm glad you came today," she said.

"It was a good idea," he responded, "um, my, uh, doctor told me to come, in, and . . . I did, and, um . . . it's been a nice visit."

"So, will you be coming back?"

Without missing a beat, the man replied, "You know, I'm going to be all right. A person doesn't get over a thing like this overnight. It's going to take me a while. But don't you worry."

Behind the mirror, we and the staff were surprised again. The session had gone well. He had been engaged. A follow-up appointment had been made. Now we heard ambivalence in his voice.

For her part, Dawn was not about to let him off the hook. "I'm hoping you will come back."

"You know, I miss her terribly," he said, "it's awfully lonely at night. But, I'll be all right. As I said, don't worry about me."

"I appreciate that, appreciate what you just said, but actually what I worry about is that I missed something. Come to think about it, if we were to change places, if I were in your shoes, I'd be wondering, 'What really can she know or understand about this, and more, what can she possibly do?'"

A long silence followed. Eventually, the man looked up, and with tears in his eyes, caught her gaze.

Softly, Dawn continued, "I'd like you to come back. I'm not sure what this might mean to you right now, but you don't have to do this alone."

Nodding affirmatively, the man stood, took Dawn's hand, and gave it a squeeze. "See you, then."

Several sessions followed. During that period his scores on the standardized outcome measure improved considerably. At the time, the team was impressed with Dawn. Her sensitivity and persistence paid off, keeping the elderly man engaged, and preventing his dropping out. The real import of her actions, however, did not occur to any of us until much later.

All therapists experience similar incisive moments in their work with clients; times when they are acutely insightful, discerning, even wise. However, such experiences are actually of little consequence in separating the good from the great. Instead, superior performance is found in the margins—the small but consistent difference in the number of times corrective feedback is sought, successfully obtained, and then acted on.

Most therapists, when asked, report that they check in routinely with their clients and know when to do so. But our own research found this to be far from the case. In early 1998, we initiated a study to investigate the impact on treatment outcome of seeking client feedback. Several formats were included. In one, therapists were supposed to seek informal client input on their own. In another, standardized, client-completed outcome and alliance measures were administered and the results shared with fellow therapists. Treatment-as-usual served as a third, control group.

Initial results of the study pointed to an advantage for the feedback conditions. Ultimately, however, the entire project had to be scrapped as a review of the videotapes showed that the therapists in the informal group failed routinely to ask clients for their input—even though, when later queried, the clinicians maintained they had sought feedback.

For their part, supershrinks consistently seek client feedback about how the client feels about them and their work together; they don't just say they do. Dawn perhaps said it best: "I always ask. Ninety-nine per cent of the time, it doesn't go anywhere—at least at the moment. Sometimes I'll get a call, but rarely. More likely, I'll call, and every so often my nosiness uncovers something, some, I don't know quite how to say it, some barrier or break, something in the way of our working together." Such persistence in the face of infrequent payoff is a defining characteristic of those destined for greatness.

Whereas birds can fly, the rest of us need an airplane. When a simple measure of the alliance is used in conjunction with a standardized outcome scale, available evidence shows clients are less likely to deteriorate, more likely to stay longer, and twice as likely to achieve a change of clinical significance. What is more, when applied on an agency-wide basis, tracking client progress and experience of the therapeutic relationship has an effect similar to the one noted earlier in the Olympics: across the board, performance improves; everyone gets better. As John F. Kennedy was fond of saying, "A rising tide lifts all boats."

While it is true that the tide raises everyone, we have observed that supershrinks continue to beat others out of the dock. Two factors account for this. As noted earlier, superior performers engage in significantly more deliberate practice. That is, as Ericsson, the expert on experts says, "effortful activity designed to improve individual target performance." Specific methods of deliberate practice have been developed and employed in the training of pilots, surgeons, and others in highly demanding occupations. Our most recent work has focused on adapting these procedures for use in psychotherapy.

In practical terms, the process involves three steps: think, act, and, finally, reflect. This approach can be remembered by the acronym, T.A.R. To prepare for moving beyond the realm of reliable performance, the best of the best engage in forethought. This means they set specific goals and identify the particular ways they will use to reach their goals. It is important to note that superior performance depends on simultaneously attending to both the ends and the means.

To illustrate, suppose a therapist wanted to improve the engagement level of clients mandated into treatment for substance abuse. First, they would need to define in measurable terms how they would know, what they would see, that would tell them the client is engaged actively in the treatment (e.g., attendance, dialog, eye contact, posture, etc.). Following this, the therapist would develop a step-by-step plan to achieve the specific objectives. Because therapies that focus on client goals result in greater participation, the therapist might, for example, create a list of questions designed to elicit and confirm what the client wants. Not only this, but time would be spent in anticipating what the client might say and planning a strategy for each response.

In the act phase, successful experts track their performance. They monitor on an ongoing basis whether they used each of the steps or strategies outlined in the thinking phase and the quality with which each step was executed. The sheer volume of detail gathered in assessing their performance distinguishes the exceptional from their more average counterparts.

During the reflection phase, top performers review the details of their performance, and identify specific actions and alternate strategies for reaching their goals. Where unsuccessful learners paint with broad strokes, and attribute failure to external and uncontrollable factors (e.g., "I had a bad day," "I wasn't with it"), the experts know exactly what they do, more often citing controllable factors (e.g., "I should have done x instead of y," of "I forgot to do x and will do x plus y next time"). In our work with psychotherapists, for example, we have found that average practitioners are more likely to spend time hypothesizing about failed strategies, believing perhaps that understanding the reasons why an approach did not work will lead to better outcomes, and less time thinking about strategies that might be more effective.

Returning to the example above, an average therapist would be more likely to attribute failure to engage the mandated substance abuser to denial, resistance, or lack motivation. The expert on the other hand would say, "Instead of organizing the session around 'drug use,' I should have emphasized what the client wanted—getting his driver's license back. Next time, I will explore in detail what the two of us need to do right now to get him back in the driver's seat."

The penchant for seeking explanations for treatment failures can have life-and-death consequences. In the 1960s, the average lifespan of children with cystic fibrosis treated by "proficient" pediatricians was three years. The field as a whole attributed the high mortality rate routinely to the illness itself, a belief which, in retrospect, can only be viewed as a self-fulfilling prophecy. After all, why search for alternative methods if the disease invariably kills? Although certainly less dramatic, psychologist William Miller makes a similar point about psychotherapy, noting that most models do not account for how people change, but rather why they stay the same. In our experience, diagnostic classifications often serve a similar function by attributing the cause of a failing or failed therapy to the disorder.

By comparison, deliberate practice bestows clear advantages. In place of static stories and summary conclusions, options predominate. Take chess, for example. The unimaginable speed with which master players intuit the board and make their moves gives them the appearance of wizards, especially to dabblers. Research proves this to be far from the case. In point of fact, they possess no unique or innate ability or advantage in memory. Far from it. Their command of the game is simply a function of numbers: they have played this game and a thousand others before. As a result, they have more means at their disposal.

The difference between average and world-class players becomes especially apparent when stress becomes a factor. Confronted by novel, complex, or challenging situations, the focus of the merely proficient performers narrows to the point of tunnel vision. In chess, these people are easy to spot. They are the ones sitting hunched over the board, their finger glued to a piece, contemplating the next move. But studies of pilots, air traffic controllers, emergency room staff, and others in demanding situations and pursuits show that superior performers expand their awareness, availing themselves of all the options they have identified, rehearsed, and perfected over time.

Deliberate practice, to be sure, is not for the harried or hassled. Neither is it for slackers. Yet the willingness to engage in deliberate practice is what separates the "wheat from the chaff." The reason is simple: doing it is unrewarding in almost every way. As Ericsson notes, "Unlike play, deliberate practice is not inherently motivating; and unlike work, it does not lead to immediate social and monetary rewards. In addition, engaging in [it] generates costs." No third party (e.g., client, insurance company, or government body) will pay for the time spent to track client progress and alliance, identify at-risk cases, develop alternate strategies, seek permission to record treatment sessions, insure HIPAA compliance and confidentiality, systematically review the recordings, evaluate and refine the execution of the strategies, and solicit outside consultation, training, or coaching specific to particular skill sets. And, let's face it, few of us are willing pay for it out of pocket. But this, and all we have just described, is exactly what the supershrinks do. In a word, they are self-motivated. What leads people, children and adults, to devote the time, energy, and resources necessary to achieve greatness is poorly understood. Even when the path to improved performance is clear and requires little effort, most do not follow through. As recently reported in The New York Times, a study of 12 highly experienced gastroenterologists, each having performed a minimum of 3,000 colonoscopies, found that some were 10 times better at finding precancerous polyps than others. An extremely simple solution, one involving no technical skill or diagnostic prowess, was found to increase the polyp-detection rate by 50 percent. Sadly, despite this dramatic improvement, most of the doctors stopped using the remedy the moment the clinical trial ended.

Ericsson and colleagues believe that future studies of elite performers will give us a better idea of how motivation is promoted and sustained. Until then, we know that deliberate practice works best when done multiple times each day, including weekends, for short periods, interrupted by brief rest breaks. "Cramming" or "crash courses" don't work and increase the likelihood of exhaustion and burnout.

The Institute for the Study of Therapeutic Change is developing a web-based system to facilitate deliberate practice. The system is patterned after similar programs in use with pilots, surgeons, and other professionals. The advantage here is that the steps to excellence are automated. At www.myoutcomes.com, clinicians are already able to track their outcomes, establish their baseline, and compare their performance to national norms. The system also provides feedback to therapists when clients are at risk for deterioration or drop-out.

At present, we are testing algorithms that identify patterns in the data associated with superior outcomes. Such formulas, based on thousands of clients and therapists, will enable us to identify when an individual's performance is at variance with the pattern of excellence. When this happens, the clinician will be notified by e-mail of an online deliberate practice opportunity. Such training will differ from traditional continuing education in two critical ways. First, it will be targeted to the development of skill sets specific to the needs of the individual clinician. Second, and of greater consequence in the pursuit of excellence, the impact on outcome can be measured immediately. It is our hope that such a system will make the process of deliberate practice more accessible, less onerous, and more efficient.

The present era in psychotherapy has been referred to by many leading thinkers as the "age of accountability." Everyone wants to know what they are getting for their money. But it is no longer a simple matter of cost and the bottom line. People are looking for value. As a field, we have the means at our disposal to demonstrate the worth of psychotherapy in eyes of consumers and payers and increase its value. The question is, will we?

References

Clement, P. (1994). Quantitative Evaluation of 26 Years of Private Practice. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 25, 2, 173-76.

Colvin, G. (2006, October 19). What It Takes to Be Great. Fortune.

Ericsson, K. A. (2006). Cambridge Handbook of Expertise and Expert Performance. United Kingdom: Cambridge University Press.

Gawande, Atul. (2004, December 6). The Bell Curve. The New Yorker.

Hiatt, D. & Hargrave, G. E. (1995). The Characteristics of Highly Effective Therapists in Managed Behavioral Provider Networks. Behavioral Healthcare Tomorrow, 4, 19-22.

Miller S., Duncan, B., Brown, J., Sorrell, R., & Chalk, M. (2007). Using Formal Client Feedback to Improve Retention and Outcome. Journal of Brief Therapy, 5, 19-28.

Ricks, D.F. (1974). Supershrink: Methods of a therapist judged successful on the basis of adult outcomes of adolescent patients. In D. F. Ricks, M. Roff (Eds.), Life History Research in Psychopathology. Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, 275-297.

Villarosa, L. (2006, December 19). Done Right, Colonoscopy Takes Time, Study Finds. The New York Times, Health Section.

Wampold, B. E. & Brown, J. (2005). Estimating Variability in Outcomes Attributable to Therapists: A Naturalistic Study of Outcomes in Managed Care. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 73, 5, 914-23.

Beyond Psychotherapy: Working Outside the Medical Model

"Do you take insurance?" is a question I often get from prospective clients, although less frequently these days.

My answer, in a nutshell, is "I don't." In fact, I resigned from the last of my managed care/preferred provider panels over 15 years ago. This essay explains the reasoning behind my decision, and how my practice as a licensed psychologist has evolved since then.

History

First, a word on the historical context. In the 1960s, with the advent of state licensing of psychologists, our incentives to formulate DSM-based diagnoses changed radically. Psychologists fought hard for parity with psychiatrists, and eventually won the right to be reimbursed by third parties (insurance companies) for the "medically necessary treatment of mental and nervous disease."

For a while, nearly everyone with insurance that covered psychological services had complete freedom of choice: clients chose a psychiatrist, psychologist or other licensed mental health professional more or less without restriction, and bills submitted for reimbursement were routinely paid, with minimal rigmarole by insurance companies, up to the contract's limits. This was a huge benefit to psychologists like me, although for some of us the cost of this change was also substantial: “In order to participate, psychologists, including those of us who were ill-disposed to do so, were required to start thinking of clients and their problems in terms of psychiatric diagnoses a la the DSM.”

Whether or not we ordinarily thought of clients in the context of mental illnesses and disease classifications, participation in the third party reimbursement system demanded that each client be labeled with a diagnosis, which in turn became part of their permanent medical record. The insurance companies were relatively uninvolved in diagnoses and treatment plans. Diagnostic codes were shared with insurers, but details about cases were kept private.

With the advent of managed care in the early 1980s, everything changed. Psychiatrists, psychologists and other providers of psychological services were now under contract with insurers (and/or their representatives and intermediaries, such as managed behavioral health companies), and were compelled by the terms of those contracts to participate in "utilization review." Practically speaking, this typically meant periodically making detailed disclosures of formerly confidential information about the clients to one or more case managers. Based on that information, which usually included diagnosis, history, presenting problems, progress, and treatment plan, case managers were empowered to authorize (or deny) ongoing psychological work. Disagreements between the service providers and case managers were common, and their resolutions often favored the cost-savings perspective of the case managers over those of the mental health professionals.

Since many case managers, at least at that time, had minimal training in psychology and psychotherapy, we therapists frequently complained (at least to one another) that non-professionals were making treatment decisions, sometimes cutting off reimbursement mid-treatment and without warning. “Clients were sometimes horrified to learn that the forms they signed to obtain insurance reimbursement included waivers of their confidentiality rights”, and that insurers and employees of the insurance companies had access to their confidential treatment information.

Fast-forward to today. Third-party reimbursement methodologies have become increasingly complex, and the system is run by many different business models and multiple layers of bureaucracy that were unheard of in the 1980s. But the basic concept remains the same: Psychologists and other mental health professionals are contracted providers, and as providers, we agree to provide only "medically necessary treatment" as authorized by the insurer. In some cases we are still required to formulate a diagnosis and treatment plan in order to make our case for "medical necessity," and confidential treatment information is utilized by an array of people in order to make decisions about the course of our clients' treatment. To make matters worse, contracted rates have generally been frozen for the past 20 years, so after taking inflation into account, providers' real income has decreased by as much as 50 percent.

Some insurance companies have given up on doing "utilization review," undoubtedly because they have found that the cost of providing such oversight is really not cost-effective. Others periodically try new approaches or recycle old approaches, alternating from telephone-, fax-, email- or web-based treatment reviews. Recently colleagues have reported to me that they have received letters from insurers pointing out that they have been seeing a certain patient for X number of sessions, and they might want to consult with the insurance companies' professional staff. Honestly, I cannot imagine any of my peers voluntarily phoning United Behavioral Health or Value Options or any of the other managed behavioral health companies to gain insights into how to provide more effective treatment! But as long as third parties are involved, the ultimate fate of that confidential information is beyond the control of the professional. Who does and who does not gain access to patient information depends on the policies and procedures of the administrative entity making the decisions about reimbursement, within the limits of current law.

"Diagnosis and treatment" constitutes the core language of the medical model. From the perspective of third party-payers, of course it makes sense to apply this same model to psychological treatment. Health insurance is, after all, intended to pay medical bills when a person becomes sick or injured. So as long as our work is being reimbursed as part of one's medical insurance, psychotherapy will continue to be seen as a treatment for a medical condition. But this isn't the only way to think about our clients and their presenting problems; in fact, it may not even be the most productive way.

In the mid-1990s, I finally resigned from the preferred provider networks I had joined some years before. I realized that in the majority of instances I couldn't, in good conscience, make a case that my clients were psychologically ill: “I too often found myself in the awkward position of agreeing with the insurer that my clients' requests for reimbursement should probably be denied.”

DSM and Psychotherapy

Critiques of the DSM are widespread, widely known and well reasoned on both scientific and philosophical grounds. I am typically in agreement with the perspective that says many of the DSM diagnostic categories represent artificial and poorly justified distinctions constructed between normal dimensions of human functioning. I'm not suggesting that all diagnosis is unjustified: certainly some individuals suffer from significant disturbances such as major depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or other conditions that can be rightfully considered psychiatric "disorders." However, I have found that I must ask myself again and again: how relevant is the concept of a disorder for most of my private clients? Do I feel confident about applying a DSM-based diagnosis when I recognize that this diagnosis will stay with him or her for life? Do I really believe this client is "mentally ill?"

Personally, I've concluded that not everything that looks like pathology is pathological, nor is every emotional pain, even persistent pain, necessarily a sign that something is broken and needs fixing. For example, while a person stuck in an unhappy marriage may be in considerable distress, defended against certain unwelcome feelings and completely paralyzed about what to do, I ask myself, does this make them somehow psychologically unwell? Or are they just stuck? Ordinary human feelings like frustration, disappointment, sadness and lack of enthusiasm can be mislabeled as depression. Likewise, worry, agitation and fearfulness can sometimes be mislabeled as an anxiety disorder, just as run-of-the-mill shyness can be called a social phobia. We need to recognize that there are vast individual differences among healthy humans and that different doesn't mean disordered. Moreover, most of us believe that some emotional pain is normal, not pathological, and in fact needs to be accepted as part of life. This is certainly a core aspect of the mindfulness-based approaches, which have recently become popular, but this belief runs counter to our efforts to diagnose and treat. And although many practitioners would say that they don't really take the DSM seriously, and they give a diagnosis in order to essentially "play the insurance game" that's required to be reimbursed, I think it is hard not to be at least subtly influenced by the pressures of playing the game, which reinforces the idea of psychopathology.

I have no quarrel with professionals whose psychological world-view is consistent with the DSM, and who are able to utilize the DSM-based diagnostic categories without internal conflict. However, I personally believe that most of the clients I have seen in my private practice are basically healthy and suffering from transient psychological confusion and/or pain. Diagnosis isn't really relevant for them, nor is the DSM.

Adjustment Disorders

The DSM's 309-series codes, "adjustment disorders," are a set of broadly defined categories of normal functioning that include problems-in-living with various emotional sequelae. These codes do in fact seem relevant, although not particularly useful, for the vast majority of clients I've worked with in the past 25 years. Unlike other diagnostic codes, however, the 309-codes don't really describe pathology, although they are characterized by "marked distress that is in excess of what would be expected from exposure to the stressor." But how do we decide what qualifies as "excessive" versus "normal"? Our primary approach of thinking about "normality" is (I hope!) primarily psychological, not statistical. Statistically, "excessive" refers to instances in the tails of some distribution curve. But psychologically, the amount of distress being experienced by any given person will almost certainly turn out to be exactly what would be expected for that person, at that time, under those circumstances. In a way, psychologically speaking, the idea of "excessive" distress is a bit absurd.

Alternatives to Diagnosis

But if we're not treating mental disease, what are we doing? Here's my personal answer, which evolves out of my professional history: I have a PhD from Stanford in developmental psychology. Before getting post-doctoral clinical training, obtaining a license and starting my private practice, I spent more than a decade at Stanford doing research on normal adults and their children. The focus of my research was on the evolution of two-person relationships and on identifying ways that researchers might meaningfully differentiate relationships from one another. I also specialized in research methodology, statistics and the philosophy of science. During my years at Stanford, I therefore learned a lot about normal human development and about normal, even exceptional, high-functioning two-person relationships. Just as importantly, I learned a lot about hypothesis generation, hypothesis testing and the nature of scientific evidence. I learned to question everything, and to require overwhelming evidence before accepting that the conclusions drawn from some study are anything but figments of the researchers' imaginations. I learned that a high degree of well-reasoned skepticism is part of the scientific process.

All this has allowed my professional identity to evolve, so that I now represent myself as a psychologist, but not as a psychotherapist. I think of myself as a consultant, a teacher, a mentor, or a coach who works with normal, healthy people who want to improve their lives. Instead of thinking of my clients as mentally ill and of myself as a healer, I think of my clients as psychologically healthy individuals and couples seeking an unbiased, caring professional with a fresh pair of eyes and a fresh look at their situation.

My post-doctoral training in psychodynamic psychotherapy taught me how to think about the unfolding of interpersonal process and about phenomena like transference and countertransference, projection, and identification as perfectly normal processes, affecting perfectly normal people. My post-doctoral training in cognitive-behavioral therapy taught me to think about how perfectly normal people sometimes conceptualize themselves and their problems in irrational, unhelpful ways, and how acting-without-thinking frequently accompanies irrational thinking. I continue to study approaches to psychotherapy and how people change, and apply what I learn in my work with normal, healthy individuals who are in a transient state of needing some help. “Since the word "therapy" implies healing, and I don't conceptualize my clients as needing to be healed, I don't consider nor market what I do as psychotherapy.”

Collaborator not Healer

Of course, this means that my practice is a 100-percent fee-for-service practice. Since I don't do psychotherapy, I accept no reimbursement from insurance companies, and instead bill all fees directly to clients. I generally accept only clients whom I deem to be fundamentally psychologically healthy. What I actually do, however, isn't terribly different from what many psychotherapists do. I'm aware that my therapeutic style continues to have a psychodynamic feel to it, although it has evolved to be much more active and engaged than it used to be. I'm far more likely than I used to be to offer possible interpretations, suggestions, and homework assignments. I teach in the sense that I adopt a didactic stance in order to help clients understand what's happening in their lives. I'm less interested than I once was in insight for the sake of insight or the ideal cure, and am more aimed at helping my clients obtain tangible, measurable results.

Although I maintain written records similar to those that would be required of licensed psychotherapists, these records, since they do not describe treatment, are not medical records and are consequently of no interest to any insurance companies, insurance adjusters or anyone else. They are genuinely confidential records. And although my practice is HIPAA complaint, strictly speaking HIPAA doesn't apply to me either, because mine are not health records. I continue to practice exclusively within the limits of my training, experience and competence. I am very clear to prospective clients about what we can do together, and about what we will not be doing. By rendering the split between the healer and the healed irrelevant, I meet my clients as a collaborator. My client relationships feel stronger than ever, and more interpersonally authentic.

I offer this perspective simply as a way of sharing my journey as a helping professional, not as a prescription of how other therapists should think about or practice their craft. And to reiterate an important point: I do not by any means deny the existence of mental illness. Rather, I notice that it's extremely rare in clients who seek help in a private, fee-for-service practice. I also am aware that by refusing to accept insurance, I am making myself much less available to individuals who would find it economically difficult or even prohibitive to pay for my services. But for me this is the only way of operating my practice that feels congruent with my conceptualization of who my clients are and how they change—and I feel grateful that my DSM-free practice has continued to thrive. More generally, I believe that our training as psychologists makes us well suited to offer a wide range of valuable services to the public, and that psychotherapy is only one of them. We are here to help our clients, and there are many different ways to do that.

My thanks to Victor Yalom for his valuable contributions to this piece.

The Therapist Mourns His Mother’s Death: Being With Clients While Heartbroken

My mother died Dec. 18, 2005. She was 84 years old and died of complications from open heart surgery. I am a psychotherapist in private practice and had to return to work shortly after her death. I wondered how I would deal with my deep and heart-stabbing grief while I tried to help my clients work through their issues. Yet, little in graduate or post-graduate training prepares us to deal with such a time in therapy, let alone our lives.

I was fearful that a client would make a comment that would trigger me to sob in the middle of a session. Although I felt very raw in those days after her death, I knew I needed to maintain the boundary between therapist and client. After all, the therapy sessions were for my clients' benefit, not mine. Breaking down and sobbing would definitely make the session about me.

I was also worried that my level of concentration would not be one hundred percent. Normally, I can focus naturally on what a client says while seeking out a helpful response at the same time. I've become adept at checking in on my countertransferance, noticing if the client is saying anything to stir up my issues or causing me unexpected anger, sadness, or confusion. It is important for me to be aware of these feelings because they may indicate unresolved issues. In this period of grief, I wondered if I could be anywhere near as effective at this as I normally was.

As a therapist, I expect myself to be entirely present throughout the therapy hour. I expect myself to help heal clients' wounds, help them feel better about themselves, and assist them in alleviating their pain. During optimal circumstances, these goals are difficult to attain. While in the throngs of grief, it was going to be exponentially harder.

Still, I wondered what insights, revelations, and understandings I would develop while in a state of grief and mourning. Was it possible I could use my own grief during therapy sessions to help clients work through their grief? “How would I react with clients who were grieving their own losses? Would I hide my grief, break down myself, or make use of my grief for the client's benefit?” I soon found I had a chance to face these questions when I began engaging Abe about the loss of his father.

Abe's Loss

I have been working with Abe, an 18-year-old man whose father died when he was three years old. He is very bright and has a basic curiosity about how the mind and emotions interact. Abe is a seeker of all life's truths. He is very social, does well academically, and also has strong interests in drama, sports, and politics. Abe came to see me because, for the first time, he was experiencing a myriad of feelings about his father's life and death. He found these feelings to be at times overwhelming and unpredictable. He would start crying out of the blue or become agitated for no apparent reason, all the while struggling to make sense of what was happening to him.

Abe's father was only 37 years old when he died from cancer. His dad was active in city and regional politics, and a successful attorney. He loved baseball, politics, marathon running, and his family. Abe imagined that his dad was a larger-than-life figure who he should have had the opportunity to bond with. Instead, he never got to know the man and had no memories of him at all. Over the years he heard stories about his dad, but felt guilty, angry and hurt because he felt no connection with him.

Throughout his childhood, Abe's mother and older brother talked often of his father, their memories and their sadness from missing him. But Abe could not relate to their sadness since he had no memories of his father. When Abe reached his late teens, he began to notice that his life was off kilter. He found himself being sad and angry for no reason. At other times, he had difficulty with rejection and was quite moody. Abe noticed these changes and wondered if they were part of normal adolescence or if they had something to do with his father's death. As he began to face his loss, he began to grieve for the first time. He began to understand that a void was created within him after his father died; when he tried to conjure up memories of his father, nothing was there but his own sadness and anger. He was overwhelmed with the pain of not having his father's guidance and love in his life. Abe found that he felt emotional much of the time and that his feelings of loss were right on the surface. “Abe told me he had a bittersweet relationship with these feelings of grief, yet he let on that, "It feels good to grieve; it makes the loss so much more real."”

Disclosing My Mother's Death to Abe

As Abe spoke, I felt as though he was hitting the same complex note that I was facing in my life. I'd been thinking the same thing about my mother. I wondered if I should share my feelings with Abe. Would this approach be over the top and way too intense for him and me? Was I doing this because it would make him feel better or was I really doing it because it would make me feel better? I paused a moment and decided that my words would likely be helpful to him. It is difficult in the moment to know for certain if our self-disclosures will be beneficial for our clients, yet we must proceed with sharing based on what we sense and intuit.

I told Abe that I thought I understood what he was feeling. I shared that I run five miles every day while listening to music and I cry deeply when memories, thoughts, or feelings about my mother arise. Abe said that he had similar feelings about crying over the loss of his father. The powerful sadness opened a door that allowed him to make his father's death real instead of some distant intellectual construct. Although he had no memories of him, he truly knew that his father loved him, and he feels this love when he is immersed in tears. This spiritual connection provided solace to Abe.

“I learned from this encounter that although I was grieving and not operating on all cylinders in the regular world, in the therapy office it was okay to trust my intuition to intervene.” There is always some risk with a powerful intervention that clients will feel frustrated, misunderstood, and even possibly shamed. Yet, at the same time, mistakes can be utilized in the therapy if the therapist is open to dealing with the client's disagreement or fallout. With Abe, though, I felt confident that I was connecting with him in a meaningful way and that he was having none of these negative reactions. In fact, it led him to reveal more about what was going on inside of him.

Deciding to Hold Back Certain Grief Reactions from Abe

Abe talked about his experience of sharing his feelings about his father with his peers. Most of them seemed to suggest that he needed to "get over it." It seems that exploring themes of loss in a deep way is as taboo now as it was when my father died in 1966. This was the same attitude I felt from peers and adults at the time. I found my mind drifting back to the day of my father's death and I began to feel angry.

“Yet, I knew that this was not the time to process my memories of the loss of my father, and I would have to come back to it later.” Instead of sharing those awful memories, I encouraged Abe to continue searching for people who could support him. I realized that he believed this type of support was almost non-existent, but I nonetheless urged him to persevere.

Abe found one. During a tour of historic sites of the civil rights movement, he met the daughter of a slain civil rights worker and they shared their common story of losing their fathers when they were young. Abe was able to feel a deep connection with this woman and express his anguish over his loss. This experience served to move the grief along. As Abe told me about this experience, I remembered what it was like when I first heard of my mother's death. Unlike my father's death, where I didn't feel anything but numbness for years, my mother's death affected me immediately. My sister called to say that my mother had died during the early morning. The doctors did their best to save her, but she only fought as long as her body and spirit would allow. When I heard this, I moved from panic to sorrow to relief in a matter of moments. This pattern would repeat itself continually after that horrible day.

I thought about sharing the details of the day my mother died with Abe, but I decided that this was more about my own work and would not necessarily advance his mourning process. I knew that I could drift into the terrible memory and totally lose the therapeutic focus. So, I decided to process this experience on my own during my daily run the next day and in the present listened more carefully to Abe.

Using My Own Grief to Connect to Abe's Grief with Few or No Words

Abe told me that he was worried about what his grief would be like as he got older. Would he feel resolved about his father's death? If so, what would that feel like? Would he ever feel more of a connection with him than he did now?

I was facing a very similar existential dilemma. I was unclear if I would ever feel resolved about my mother's death. Would this pain ever let up? I decided to keep this struggle to myself, and said to Abe that it was wonderful that he was so introspective and that he valued challenging himself emotionally. I also said that he did not have to worry about finding answers to these questions, because he would discover solutions over time.

There were times during my sessions with Abe that he would experience deep, intense, overwhelming sorrow. I would empathize with his angst and at the same time have sharp, clear memories of my mother's last days in the hospital. I knew that I could not let these memories overtake me, which might lead me to obvious distraction or painful screams—at least not while Abe was in the room. I felt a deep empathy for Abe. I needed to use few words, and mostly utilized the invisible therapeutic bond between us. This was a moving and healing time for Abe. At times my grieving energy connected with his without me having to state directly what I was thinking about regarding my own losses; the unspoken connection was what was needed. I felt the presence of my mother's spirit in the room, filled with warmth and wisdom. I felt her smiling over me and letting me know I was doing great work. “I was learning to use my grief, sometimes directly, and, as in this moment, indirectly in my work with Abe.”

Abe, as an 18-year-old, fluctuates between the need for independence and the need for being dependent upon his mother. While this dilemma plays out with all the adolescents I work with, Abe is unique in that he is aware of these forces literally pulling him apart. I continue to be amazed at the level of his insight. He knows that on the one hand he wants his mother to grant him unconditional freedom. On the other hand, he realizes that at times he is motivated by the look of disappointment upon her face.

He told me that he and his mother had been fighting because she felt he was not giving his best efforts academically, socially, or in his drama work. It became clear that his mother's definition of best effort was not the same as Abe's. After a long and, at times, difficult discussion, both Abe and his mom cried. They came to accept each other. Abe now realizes that deep down inside his mother only wants him to be happy.

As Abe recounted this story, my eyes filled up with tears, but didn't stream down my face. I am unsure if Abe noticed this, but it would have been fine with me if he had, because my crying validated his feelings of loss. My showing of emotion also enhanced my alliance with him, and I am sure he realized that I was moved by his story and resonated with what he was going through.

I stated that he was fortunate to discover his mother's unconditional love for him at such a young age. My mother and I did not feel at ease with each other until I reached my forties. As time went on, we became closer and closer. I let down the wall that I had built up since I was 15 when my father died. When my mother died, we knew we loved each other without any reservations. The pain of her loss is often overwhelming and sometimes I miss her so much I can hardly breathe. I'm grateful, though, that I had the opportunity to experience unconditional love—a feeling you can never have if your heart is sealed shut.

I shared with Abe that I felt that he was way ahead of the game in this respect, and that he was ahead of where I was at that age. He was able to appreciate the his mother's good attributes , as well as notice her less than admirable qualities, such as being overly protective. I mentioned that being able to tolerate as well as appreciate the good and the imperfect in his mom would make it easier to tolerate those aspects inside him. He responded to my comments by affirmatively nodding his head while tears formed in his eyes. He was aware that he had a special relationship with his mother; he could share most anything with her and she would still love and accept him. He felt that I understood his relationship with his mother and this tightened my connection with him.

Finding Some Grace in the Sorrow of Grief

“I was so raw during those first few weeks after my mother's death. At times I felt that I had lost the means to filter out any kind of physical or emotional pain.” This stark vulnerability somehow increased my need to do my job well. Even in this early stage of loss, I realized that having a purpose helped in the recovery process. My main purpose was to help others heal from loss and trauma.

I feel that my work with Abe has been successful. I was able to help him understand that the loss of his father did impact his feelings of rejection from peers. I also helped him discover the gifts of grieving: the release of the angst and ultimately a real connection with his father. As I experienced this sense of a successful therapy with Abe, I felt a sense of spiritual grace surround me. This phenomenon seemed more important to me now than at any other time of my life.

During one session, I asked Abe why he thought his dad died at such a young age. Abe told me that he supposed his father died when he did because he learned all the wisdom that he was meant to learn, and therefore it was time to leave this earth. He recognized that it was comforting to give himself a reason why such tragedies occur but that these words did little to heal him.

I think that each client has the right to have his own spiritual and religious beliefs. Just the same, it is worthwhile to explore their beliefs. I shared my feelings with Abe to illustrate this point. I mentioned to Abe that I have no idea why my parents died when they did. I haven't uncovered any words of wisdom that give me solace. Expressions like, "It was God's will," "She is in a better space now," or, "It was her time to be with God" do nothing for me. This terminology may be well intended, yet is often not meaningful to the newly bereaved. I much prefer people to be good listeners and share their experiences of loss than to repeat some Hallmark Card homilies. I noticed how cynical I sounded, and decided to change the subject and come back to it later. I didn't think my words were harmful to Abe, nor did I believe they had therapeutic value. Indeed, Abe did not seem to connect to those comments one way or another, so it was best to move on.

When I first began working with Abe, he was very sensitive to rejection. He would feel rejected at times even when it wasn't clearly the case—such as when he joined a conversation with his friends late and they would not immediately respond to him. This level of sensitivity can occur while one is in the midst of grieving. I shared a story with Abe that he related to: One recent Saturday soon after my mother's death, I was feeling angry towards my wife because she could not anticipate what I was going to think or feel in the next five minutes. I cannot know what I will feel in the next five minutes, so how could I expect her to do so? However, I was feeling so raw and lost that I put those expectations on her. Suddenly I began to sob and said to my wife, "I'm really missing my mother." She hugged me and said. "I didn't know you cared for your mother so much." "Neither did I," I replied.

Feeling the Presence of the One who Died

I recently celebrated my 55th birthday, the first one without my mother. She used to call me and we would talk endlessly about the condition of the world. I knew she was on my side and I was grateful. As I headed out the door for my run that morning, I noticed something different. The sun was shining immediately after an early morning downpour. I felt my mother's presence caught between my imagination and the spirit world.

As I started to run, I listened to Etta James singing "Somewhere There's a Place for Us" and it felt as though my mother was actually listening with me. I saw her alive, laughing. Then I imagined her dead, eyes closed, smile on her face, and felt a deep sense of gloom. I wondered if this was the only connection I would ever have with her again. Although I was still running, I suddenly felt as though I was standing still. A brand new thought entered my mind: Will my spirit join hers when I die? If so, how will it be? Will I be surrounded by her unconditional love? Will I have the ability to move from the spirit of one loved one to another? Is this what heaven is like? This was the first time I ever considered that there might be an afterlife. Before this, I had always been so cynical about it. Perhaps this major gift comes out of my mother's dying.

I shared this story with Abe, and I asked him if he believed in an afterlife. He wasn't sure, but he felt that he was in touch with his father's spirit. He talked about coming-of-age events like shaving and dating. When he reached these events, he felt that his father was instructing him how to succeed at them. Tears came to his eyes as he shared this story. He was aware that these grief-filled moments brought him closer to his father's spirit.

I shared this experience with Abe, because I sensed that he was wondering about the afterlife and I hoped it would be another experience where I could connect with him. I did not have a sense that Abe would feel pressured to agree with me, but that it would stimulate his own thinking and feelings, which would further his healing process.

I didn't share Abe's experience of not having any memories of a deceased parent and I attempted to help him come to terms with this burden. He knew innately that his father loved him, and this grounded him for the deep work he immersed himself in. I felt that my job was to guide him from the point of numbness, to healing his deep wounds and gaining a fuller understanding of what happened to him when his father died. When possible and relevant, “I often direct those clients who are dealing with mixed feelings about the loss of a loved one to find a place inside to hold that loved one in a peaceful manner.”

I am not sure what Abe will go through or what this place will be like when he discovers it, but I feel honored to participate in his voyage. I do know that I have been blessed with the rare opportunity to help a client face his grieving process while dealing with the death of my mother. And I believe that going deeper into my own grief helped me understand Abe's losses more fully, connect to him in a real way, and assist him in coming to terms with the loss of his father. The pain of loss can be a powerful means to heal others.

Suggestions for therapists in the initial stages of recovering from the loss of a loved one

Have a strategy in place

Now is not the time for flying by the seat of your pants. If your style is to not share your personal life with your clients, there is no reason to change that now. My style has been to self-disclose and share parts of my life with clients when I believe that this information will enable them to work through conflicts and grow emotionally. I continued this way of working after my mother died. Still, I needed to remind myself that I was telling my story for the client's sake, not mine.

Take Care of Yourself

How often have we instructed our clients that self-care was of supreme importance? This principle also applies to therapists who are in the early stages of grief. I exercise almost every day, and writing has also been a healing vehicle. Individual therapy, grief support groups, and other self-help groups are viable options. I feel that it is important to face and embrace the pain of my mother's loss every day. This way of mourning is not for everyone. We all need to discover our own pace and our own means to work through the anguish.

Be Self-Aware

Whether you are alone or in a therapy session, you are always grieving. You cannot just turn it on and off like a light switch. If you suddenly feel profoundly sad during an interaction with a client, you need to ask yourself why you are feeling this way. During the past month, my despair came from the death of my mother. I trained myself to be aware of why I felt the way I did, what triggered my feelings, and what the client said that caused me to feel sad. Then I would determine if I would use this experience to illuminate what the client was facing.

Integrate your knowledge of grief and your own loss

Sometimes I am overwhelmed with feelings of hopelessness. I recently came down with a sinus infection for the first time in a decade. There are nights that I do not sleep very well. I realize that all of these unwelcome changes are the result of losing my mother and that they are normal. I also know from experience that my grief will gradually subside and at some point in time I will not feel as devastated as I do today.

Suggested Resources on Grief and Mourning

Livingstone, B. (2002). Redemption of the Shattered: A Teenager's Healing Journey through Sandtray Therapy, http://www.boblivingstone.com.

Livingstone, B. (Planned August, 2007). The Body-Mind-Soul Solution: Healing Emotional Pain through Exercise, Pegasus Books.

Simon, S, & Drantell, J. J. (1998). A Music I No Longer Heard: The Early Death of a Parent, Simon and Schuster.

Grollman, E. (1995). Living when a Loved One has Died, Beacon Press.

James, J. W. & Friedman, R. (1998). The Grief Recovery Handbook, Collins.

Worden, J. W. (2001). Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy: A Handbook for the Mental Health Professional, Springer Publishing.

Angels in Crisis: How Mobile Crisis Intervention Changes Lives

"I don't know why he's so angry all the time," Ruby Clarke said of her 11-year old son, Lucas. Ruby had grape juice all over her hair and clothes, and her face was scratched. Having met Liz and me, clinicians for the Mobile Crisis Team, just the week before, Ruby made this first crisis call to help her get Lucas under control.

Upon discharge from a nine-day psychiatric hospitalization, Lucas's Child Protective Services (CPS) social worker referred him to Mobile Crisis and gave Ruby our hotline number. We soon followed up with an introductory visit. The Mobile Crisis Team goes to a family’s home to de-escalate a crisis in order to prevent unnecessary psychiatric hospitalizations, and in some cases to facilitate necessary hospitalizations by liaising with the police. We always visit the family first in a non-crisis situation, so they can get comfortable with us. People would much rather call someone they know at the mobile crisis team than an anonymous hotline number.

 

Family History

We had learned a lot about both Lucas and Ruby at the introductory meeting. Lucas was indeed a troubled boy. He once put the family cat inside the microwave. He used to beat their dog with a sock full of ice. In the middle of the night, Ruby would find him on the floor in the hallway, rocking in a dazed state.

When Lucas was four years old, CPS removed him from his home because Ruby and her then-boyfriend, Matt, were operating a methamphetamine lab in the basement. When the police crashed the lab, they found Legos and Tonka trucks on the floor within six feet of deadly bottles of anhydrous ammonia. Ruby had been up for eight days straight. Matt had been beating both Ruby and Lucas.

Ruby began a trying half-decade of recovery work, while Lucas spent the next seven years in foster care, getting kicked out of several foster homes due to his hyperactive and violent behavior. Ruby worked hard to get her son back, following all the therapy and substance abuse treatments that were asked of her by the courts. Even though she had done a lot of work on herself, she still had an edge to her, and could easily become exasperated. After seven years without Lucas, and on the heels of a difficult recovery, she found herself alone, raising this emotionally disturbed child. She sometimes withdrew into her own space in order to calm down, often chain-smoking cigarettes on the porch.

Introductions

During our introductory visit, Lucas showed us around his room like a miniature tour guide. He pointed out his TV, video games, basketball, and dart game. He didn’t mention the duct-taped holes in the wall from previous angry outbursts, and neither did we. It was no time to rub his nose in it.

Then Lucas showed us his “angel doll,” which seemed out of place amidst the other toys. The angel doll was dressed in a worn white robe with a crinkled gold foil halo. Lucas referred to it as “my angel.” Ruby had bought it for him at a garage sale one Christmas when Lucas was three years old. Back then she was so high most of the time that she almost forgot to buy him anything at all. She had spent most of her money on drugs. She found the angel doll three days before Christmas, and bought it for two dollars. To Ruby, the doll was now a reminder of a shameful time in her life. She wished Lucas would get rid of it, but she marveled at how much “he loves that old thing.”

As Lucas talked about “his angel,” Liz and I caught each other’s glance, knowing this doll was significant. It was a link to an idealized time, and was the most tangible thing he had of his mother for all those years apart. ”Your doll must be really happy that she’s had you all these years,” Liz said. “It can be scary sometimes, especially with all the new places you guys have been to.” Liz had a beautiful way with kids—she was caring, authentic, fun, and always optimistic about a child’s ability to recover.

“I guess so,” Lucas said.

“She probably wasn’t too worried, though. I bet she always knew you would never leave her behind.”

Lucas smiled sheepishly, leaned in close and whispered to Liz as if he didn’t want to embarrass her, “You know, she’s just a doll. She doesn’t really have feelings. I like her because she can fly and she reminds me of Christmas.”

Liz acted as if this was the first she’d heard about dolls not having feelings. “Oh, I see!"

Lucas had a right to be angry, but he didn’t know that. Any irritation in the present triggered an outpouring of pain from his past. He feared his angry self. Lucas was also more resilient than he could ever know. He still managed to smile, laugh, help others, and even make friends no matter how often he moved. Maintaining those friendships was tremendously difficult, but he could always win people over initially.

The First Crisis Intervention

Now, six days after our introductory visit, Ruby called our hotline. Lucas had arrived home from school in a foul mood, throwing his backpack down hard on the floor. A few days before, Ruby had instituted a 30-minute quiet time for Lucas in which he would relax after school. Lucas had taken to playing his videogames during this time, which actually only served to further stimulate him. The day Ruby called the hotline he was hyper and irritable, yelling for his mother to cook tater tots while he never took his eyes from the TV screen, thumping and tapping buttons and triggers rapidly. When Ruby suggested something else for dinner, Lucas knocked over his grape juice and began throwing a fit. He toppled a kitchen chair and stomped one of the legs off. He threw things around the house and yelled obscenities at Ruby.

The Mobile Crisis Team arrived at the home and we began our intervention. We address each crisis without taking sides. We present ourselves as compassionate to the child’s plight. We know he’s having a difficult time and probably has a logical reason to be upset. So we often ask, “How can we figure something out together?” From beginning to end, we deal with each crisis with an understanding that the situation is relational; there is no one “bad guy.” From the introductory visit onward, we make it clear to the parents that we are not “the heavy,” not to be used as a punishment, as in “You’d better calm down or I’m gonna call Mobile Crisis on you.” Our effectiveness depends entirely on being able to build rapport quickly and problem-solve collaboratively. If exasperated parents are allowed to remove themselves from the situation, they tend to insist that we “fix” the child. This results in a child feeling scapegoated and colluded against, and renders crisis intervention ineffective. Therefore, we also tell parents that this is a family intervention, and that they will be encouraged to be actively involved in crisis resolution and prevention.

The first step in a heated situation is to “separate the combatants” and “do crowd control.” That means we make sure that family members are not milling around, adding to the chaos. Generally, we initially meet privately, first with the parent, and then the child.

When we met with Lucas in his room, we allowed him to vent and say horrible things about his mother. We told him he had good reason to be frustrated, but that we had to figure out a better way to get his needs met. Lucas began calming down, so we started guiding him toward a more complete understanding of what had happened. We emphasized how his pre-existing mood set him up to explode, and how quiet time can help prevent problems. We discussed how he felt in his body when he was getting upset (“My ears get hot”). All of these interventions were aimed at helping Lucas to recognize and regulate his own mood. We explored alternative explanations for his mother’s intentions, so Lucas could build empathy. Empathy decreases a child's motivation to act out aggressively toward others. It also prevents the abusive cycle of demonizing the other person and believing that they deserve punishment.

We then brought Lucas out to the living room and had a family meeting in which we developed a brief safety plan to prevent future crises. The plan outlined questions Ruby would ask that would prompt Lucas to notice when he was feeling irritable, at which point Lucas would choose from a list of fun and relaxing activities to engage in. Whenever he did this, he would earn stickers on a sticker chart, leading to privileges and special toys. At this point, Lucas got very excited. He chose to earn Dragonball Z cards, which was no surprise to us—so many boys we worked with said they wanted them as rewards that we put our Pokemon cards in storage and started supplying Dragonball Z packets to parents. The safety plan and sticker chart were posted on the refrigerator.

Aftercare

We continued our crisis interventions for Ruby and Lucas one or two times per week for the next few months. We were usually able to calm things down. Lucas only had to be hospitalized once more during that time, for only two days. During this time, we had also referred the family to Wraparound Services, which consists of a team designed around the individual needs and wants of the family. The team is made of mental health professionals, a family partner (i.e., a peer-counselor who is the parent of a child in the mental health system), and others, such as the family's pastor or school psychologist.

Ruby and Lucas had a long road ahead of them. Lucas still had conflicted feelings toward his mother—he rejoiced at being home again, yet feared it could all be taken away at any second; he was angry at Ruby for not protecting him earlier in his life, yet he feared that his anger would force her to go away. He felt she’d left him because he was bad, and that his anger and dread might again prove his badness. The tension caused him to test limits repeatedly, almost as if he wanted to see if his mother would cut and run before he committed to loving her. One time, when we asked him if he loved his mom, he replied “not all the way.” Sometimes he could be overheard in his room venting to the angel doll as if it were a counselor.

We knew that Ruby needed to set firm, unemotional, consistent, and fair limits. In her case, it was essential that she not express exasperation or otherwise be too emotional when setting limits. Lucas would see that as a sign that things were still negotiable. He knew that if he pushed hard enough, she would give in. These interventions are filed under "parenting education." But Ruby and Lucas were also in a developmental crisis (i.e. a transitional state that anyone would struggle with). They were suddenly engaged in a parent-child dynamic. They were a reunited family with emotional baggage left to unpack. So as part of our interventions, we devised ways to help Ruby and Lucas rebuild their relationship.

Because they needed to intensify their positive interactions, the refrigerator soon had a second sticker chart of a blue sky with some puffy clouds in it. We gave Lucas and his mom each a roll of smiley sun stickers and instructed them to put a sticker on the chart anytime they acknowledged the other person doing something positive. When the whole sky was full of sunshine stickers, they earned a very special outing together. Lucas got a tremendous kick out of being able to give stickers for a change. They earned many outings together and their relationship blossomed. They saw the Harlem Globetrotters; they went on a safari; they went to an NBA autograph signing.

In good mobile crisis work with children and families, the heart of the work is this kind of ongoing aftercare. The acute crisis may end quickly with directive interventions based on ensuring safety and restoring emotional equilibrium. But the family is almost always in a vulnerable state in which other stressful events will trigger more crises. Therefore, we focus on crisis prevention. It's not about putting out fires, it's about fire-proofing. In addition to parenting education and relationship-building, aftercare involves enlisting (or developing) the family's natural social support. Most families don't want to have to rely on professional support all the time. To do so quickly becomes demoralizing. There are usually a few neighbors, extended family, and friends at work or church who are more than willing to help. Ruby had such helpers as part of her Wraparound team.

Five months later, things were going well. Wraparound was helping a lot, and Lucas was responding well to a new therapist. Lucas was his “usual hyper, moody self,” but he hadn’t had any major outbursts. He was passing all his classes at school. All the pieces were coming together—Mobile Crisis, Wraparound, psychiatry, therapy. The crisis calls tapered off.

A Celebration

Roughly six months after our last visit, the Wraparound coordinator called to invite us to a celebration for Lucas, who had just made Eagle Scout. Liz, now seven months pregnant, nearly fell off her chair when I told her about the invitation.

The atmosphere in the home was jovial and relaxed. Ruby took our coats and Lucas offered us something to drink. As often happens when emotionally disturbed kids turn the corner, they seem somehow more mature than their chronological age, perhaps as a result of all the storms they’ve had to weather. Many familiar faces were there from the Wraparound team, and several new friends that Ruby had met through church. She had built up quite a group of support for herself. Everyone was gentle and kind toward Lucas. Several people made toasts to Lucas and his mom. I spoke about how thankful we were to have worked with them.

Lucas trotted to his room when it came time for us to leave. He emerged a minute later carrying the angel doll. As Liz was wrapping her coat around her giant belly, Lucas held the angel doll up to her. “Here’s a present for your baby.”

“But this is your angel doll,” Liz said. “You’ve had it forever. I couldn’t possibly take it.”

“Go ahead,” he said, nudging it toward her. Liz looked over at me.

“Well,” I said, “I think the doll likes you. How can you turn down an angel?” Ruby stood behind Lucas, smiling the widest smile I had ever seen.

Liz’s eyes were swelling with tears as she took the doll. “Thank you.”

Lucas seemed concerned. “It’s okay. I don’t need it anymore.”

“No, I suppose you don’t.” Liz said. When we got to the car, she collapsed in tears. “Can you believe that? What that must mean to him!”

That was the last we heard from the Clarke family. Liz had a baby boy seven weeks later. She keeps the angel doll on a shelf in her baby’s room. She plans to give the doll to her son, and one day when he’s old enough, she’s going to tell him a story about how angels really do exist, even against all the odds.

Self-Help Snake Oil and Self-Improvement Urban Legends

People seeking the help of a psychotherapist almost always do so after trying—and failing—to help themselves. Many have self-medicated, using everything from herbal remedies (e.g., St. John's Wort for depression) to alcohol or other drugs. Still others have tried to enact the psychological advice they sought from friends or family. But many turn to the products and services put forth by what we might call the self-help or self-improvement "industry." It is a large industry indeed. A 2004 study by Marketdata estimated that Americans spend $8.5 billion on self-improvement products and services annually, including over $600 million on self-help books alone.

The problem with the self-improvement industry is that it is better described as an unregulated "wild west" rather than staid science. Certainly much of what this industry offers is high quality, and is put forth by reputable psychologists. But in this article we'll focus on the seamier side of this industry, as we explore self-help snake oil and self-improvement urban legends. In particular, we'll focus on how professional psychologists can help the general public, and their clients in particular, separate the good this industry has to offer from the bad and the ugly. As we shall see, fruitful conversations with clients can result from discussing the misperceptions fostered by snake oil, and the deeper truths underlying many psychological urban legends.

Repeat after me: "Affirmations don't work. Affirmations don't work."

Many self-help books advocate the use of "incantations" or "affirmations." Simply repeat phrases such as "I like myself" over and over again, we are told, and soon we will experience an enhanced self-image and boosted self-esteem. This idea is not new. In the 1920s, French pharmacist Emile Coué created an international fad of "autosuggestion" by encouraging everyone to repeat the mantra: "Day by day, in every way, I am getting better and better." Repeating it aloud 20 times each morning and evening was supposed to result in health, wealth, and pretty much whatever else one wanted (it does, after all, specify improvement "in every way.")

This technique supposedly influenced the unconscious mind, and struck a chord amidst the growing popularization of Freudian psychology. But of course, if this technique worked as advertised, the vast majority of psychotherapists would immediately be out of business, today's epidemic of depression would be easily reversed, and everyone would walk around grinning like Stepford wives. Research clearly demonstrates the many psychological and physical benefits of optimism. The problem is "getting there from here," and affirmations are unlikely to foster an authentic and lasting change from a pessimistic style of thinking to a more optimistic one.

The same criticism could be made of Norman Vincent Peale's The Power of Positive Thinking, which had a record-setting run on best-seller lists in the 1950s and remains popular today. Few would argue with its basic premise, but today its techniques seem quaint and simplistic (For example, Peale recommended "mind clearing," which simply meant purging the mind of negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ones.). Many clients will express some familiarity with the concept of positive thinking, and perhaps some frustration with the ineffectiveness of techniques such as affirmations. Psychologists can use these occasions as segues to discussing the very real benefits of optimism, and the more potent techniques for achieving it such as reshaping one's attributional style, or the types of counter-arguing strategies offered by cognitive-behavioral therapy.

Subliminal self-help tapes: Just when you thought affirmations couldn't get easier

Self-help snake oil is typically sold with the promise of easy, effortless change. And perhaps the only thing easier than repeating affirmations is listening to someone else repeat them for you. That's the premise behind subliminal self-help tapes, a $50 million industry featuring products that promise to improve memory, enhance workplace performance, aid in weight loss, and make a host of other lifestyle changes.

These products are simply affirmations with a high-tech makeover and bigger marketing budgets, and every independent study has shown that these tapes don't work as advertised. In fact, they have only two reliable effects, with the first being removing money from the buyer's pocket and placing it into the seller's. The second, more psychologically interesting effect is what psychologist Anthony Pratkanis has called the illusory placebo effect.

Consider one of the studies conducted by Pratkanis and his colleagues. Participants took baseline tests of self-esteem and memory, and then listened to subliminal tapes purported to improve either self-esteem or memory. But here's the twist—half of the participants received tapes that were correctly labeled, while the other half were given mislabeled tapes. In other words, some purported self-esteem-enhancing tapes were labeled as memory improvers, while some tapes that promised to improve memory were labeled as self-esteem enhancers. Everyone was given instructions on how to use the tapes, and each participant was called weekly with encouragement to continue listening to the tapes. Five weeks later, the self-esteem and memory of all participants were measured again.1

Consistent with other studies, these tapes did not deliver the benefits their manufacturers had promised, as there was no significant improvement in self-esteem or memory. Although the tapes themselves had no effect, the labels did. Those who listened to tapes labeled as self-esteem enhancers believed their self-esteem had improved (in fact, self-esteem remained stable). Similarly, those who listened to tapes labeled as memory enhancers believed their memory had improved (in fact, their memories had not improved). Thus the illusory placebo effect: Like a placebo, the tapes had an effect only because users expected them to have an effect, but the effect was illusory, not real.

This study and others like it not only debunk ineffective products, they reveal the insidious nature of self-help snake oil. When people mistakenly believe they have been helped, they fall short of their own potential, and unwittingly aid dubious companies by becoming loyal customers and persuading others to do the same. Nineteenth-century snake oils had similar effects. Many contained a mixture of alcohol and opium known as laudanum, and it pretty much doesn't matter what's wrong with you—taking alcohol and opium will make you feel better, even though the underlying medical conditions often become worse. It is an important message for psychologists and clients alike: Just because something makes you feel temporarily better doesn't mean it is safe, effective, or does what its proponents claim.

For psychotherapists whose clients have tried these products, an opportunity exists to discuss their misleading claims, and contrast them with how psychological change truly happens. A cognitive-behavioral therapist, for example, would likely dismiss the entire premise of reshaping the unconscious mind, choosing to focus instead on conscious thoughts and overt behaviors. In contrast, someone of a more psychoanalytic bent would likely explain that, although unconscious desires are important, psychological change begins with bringing those desires into conscious awareness, a process not facilitated by subliminal affirmations.

The Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study: A fictitious study can't create an international uproar . . . can it?

How do marketers sell self-help snake oil? By using the "supporting" research from self-improvement urban legends. Subliminal self-help tapes are often sold on the basis of an infamous study conducted in the mind 1950s, in which advertising "expert" James Vicary supposedly exposed thousands of New Jersey movie-goers to the subliminal messages Eat Popcorn and Drink Coke. Vicary claimed dramatic results: an 18-percent increase in Coke sales and a 57.5-percent increase in popcorn sales.

Even more dramatic were the results outside the movie theater. After the study was publicized, several nations outlawed subliminal advertising, and the US Federal Communications Commission threatened to strip the broadcast license of anyone using it. In less than one year after the results were announced, nearly half of Americans had heard of subliminal advertising; by the 1980s, that figure had risen to nearly 80 percent, with two-thirds of those believing it could be effective in shaping behavior. By the mid-90s, subliminal advertising achieved a pop culture mainstream double-whammy—Saturday Night Live and beer commercials—with Kevin Nealon's character Subliminal Man. Today, an online search for "subliminal advertising" yields over 280,000 hits, with "eat popcorn drink coke" yielding over 60,000. And although the first few online results clearly debunk the study, many of these Internet sources present the study as valid evidence for the effectiveness of subliminal self-help products.

There are many "footnotes" to this study that never gained the notoriety of the original—particularly the fact that Vicary recanted. Sort of. In 1962, he admitted that the study wasn't quite as good as advertised (pun intended): "We hadn't done any research, except what was needed for filing for a patent. I had only a minor interest in the company and a small amount of data—too small to be meaningful. And what we had shouldn't have been used promotionally." This carefully worded "non-admission admission" stops short of acknowledging the study as an outright fraud, and opens a loophole that many snake-oil-peddling web sites use to question the sincerity of Vicary's recantation.

But even more damning have been the repeated failures to replicate Vicary's dramatic results. Precisely replicating Vicary's methodology wasn't easy, given that his study was never published in a scientific journal, and the most detailed description of its methodology was in a 1957 issue of Senior Scholastic—a magazine written for junior-high students. But that didn't stop researchers from conducting hundreds of similar studies, virtually all of which conclude that subliminal messages have no significant effect on behavior at all.

Although carefully controlled laboratory studies may be most persuasive to scientists, perhaps it is a pair of naturalistic field studies that best illustrate the point. In 1958, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation subliminally flashed the message "Phone Now" 352 times during one of their programs. Not only was there no increase in calls, but when viewers were later asked to guess the message, most reported being hungry or thirsty. Apparently Vicary's subliminal messages of Eat Popcorn and Drink Coke shaped behavior after all—they created a placebo effect that was felt years later and a country away. Remarkably, police in Wichita, Kansas conducted an almost exact replica of this study 20 years later. Desperate for a break in the hunt for the publicity-hungry murderer known as the BTK Killer, police instructed a local television station to subliminally flash the message "Now Call the Chief" during a news broadcast. Unfortunately, no one called, and another 30 years passed before police made an arrest in the case.

Like all great urban legends, the story of the Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study captured the public imagination despite the evidence largely because it conveyed a message that people were particularly ready to hear. The Zeitgeist of the late 1950s was characterized by Cold War paranoia and the fear that science was being used for negative purposes. Movies like The Manchurian Candidate depicted brainwashed assassins whose behavior was controlled by forces of which they weren't consciously aware. Books like Vance Packard's The Status Seekers revealed how marketers had shifted from overt messages such as Buy Product X to more subtle methods of capitalizing on consumers' fears and insecurities.

The Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study was not the first—or the last—time that subliminal phenomena became a national fad because they meshed with what people wanted to hear. Consider that…

  • In the early 1900s, psychology and advertising texts described potent subliminal effects, even though the evidence at the time was far from consistent. Not coincidentally, several popular spiritual and self-help movements of the day, such as Christian Science and the New Thought Movement, preached that the human mind had powerful but unconscious abilities to bring about health and happiness.
  • In the 1970s, Wilson Bryan Key created a lucrative cottage industry for himself with a series of best-selling books claiming that subliminal messages were being widely used in print ads. Even today, many people remember his claim that sex is subtly written into ads for everything from alcohol to Ritz crackers, but they reached mainstream popularity during the me decade because they meshed with Americans' rising distrust of advertisers and general loosening of sexual mores.
  • In the 1990s, Americans yearned for more self-help products as the "recovery movement" and "therapy culture" went mainstream. Little wonder they were so ready to believe the claims about subliminal self-help tapes.

Of course, this legend is not the only marketing weapon in the arsenal of snake oil salespeople. They are, for example, experts at making irrelevant research seem as if it supports their claims, and are skilled at blurring the lines between subliminal perception and subliminal persuasion. Research on subliminal perception has conclusively shown that, under highly controlled laboratory conditions, individuals can perceive images which are flashed very briefly, even without being consciously aware of having seen the images. But that does not translate to subliminal persuasion—there is no evidence that broad patterns of thought and behavior can be substantially influenced by subliminal messages. Yet many snake oil web sites deceptively cite studies of subliminal perception as if they are evidence for subliminal persuasion and, by extension, their snake oil products. But as selling tools these studies are not nearly as effective as the Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study. The fact is that a single vivid study with name recognition is, for most people, far more persuasive than a dozen studies published in scientific journals.

Although professional psychologists are no doubt dismayed that a dubious study is being used to sell dubious products, this is not the only detrimental effect of subliminal myths they are likely to face. Recently a young man called my office seeking something to block subliminal messages because he was being "bombarded" with them. He had seen an article on my web site debunking the subliminal industry, and had clearly missed the point. The sad fact is that he was a troubled young man, and subliminal messages were the least of his problems. The myth of subliminal persuasion led him to misinterpret the psychological challenges facing him, and distracted him from exploring more relevant and effective psychological techniques.

The Yale Study of Goals: Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy and Zig Ziglar can't all be wrong . . . can they?

Unfortunately, the Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study isn't the only urban legend used to sell less-than-effective self-improvement products. The "Yale Study of Goals," for example, has become a staple in the repertoire of motivational speakers and modern self-help writers. It has even been described in more than one best-selling book.2 As typically described, there are three elements to the study:

  • The 1953 graduating class at Yale was interviewed.
  • 3 percent had written specific written goals for their futures.
  • 20 years later, that 3 percent was found to be worth more financially than the other 97 percent combined.

This study would indeed be a dramatic illustration of the power of goal setting, except for one minor point: it was never conducted. There are literally hundreds of published studies on goals. I have read virtually all of them, and although I have read about the Yale Study of Goals in several popular self-help books, I have never seen a single reference to it in the research literature.

The Consulting Debunking Unit of Fast Company magazine deserves credit for unmasking this study as an urban legend that was passed uncritically via word of mouth until it was accepted as truth.3 When they approached Tony Robbins for documentation, a spokesperson explained that the background material for Robbins' 1986 best-seller Unlimited Power (which cites the study) "met a disastrous end," and suggested that self-help author Brian Tracy might know more. Tracy, in turn, explained how he often describes the study in his books and speeches, and that he learned of the study from motivational speaker and sales guru Zig Ziglar. When reached for comment, Ziglar was unable to locate the original study, suggesting, "Try Tony Robbins." The circle was complete. Yale gets numerous requests for information about this study and, despite extensive research, has never found any evidence that it was ever conducted. As one Yale spokesperson put it, "We are quite confident that the 'study' did not take place. We suspect it is a myth."

Urban legends typically get repeated because they convey a moral or have some deeper meaning, and there is considerable truth to the notion that goals can enhance performance. Although this urban legend is certainly not as misleading as the Eat Popcorn/Drink Coke study, it remains an excellent example of how a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing. For example, the research is clear that goals only enhance performance if they are set properly (in my work, I use the acronym SCAMPI to teach the elements of effective goals: Specific, Challenging, Approach, Measurable, Proximal, Inspirational). This urban legend fails to convey this important caveat, and doesn't teach these goal-setting principles. By coming across as "the whole story," this urban legend minimizes any motivation the reader might have to dig deeper and learn more about the true science of goal setting.

A Final Thought

A clinical psychologist's early sessions with a new client often focus largely on the history of the client's problems, including what has helped and what hasn't. An important component of such discussions are the client's history of less-than-successful attempts to solve their problems themselves. Therapists can better steer these conversations toward valuable insights and effective solutions if they are knowledgeable about the half-truths of self-improvement urban legends and the unkept promises of self-help snake oil.

Clearly, as psychologists, we have more than a therapeutic duty of helping clients solve problems—we have an educational duty as well. This obviously includes educating clients that "technique X doesn't work" or "study Y wasn't really conducted." But it should also include using this debunking as a springboard to educating clients about genuine processes for psychological change, which almost always involve thought, effort and action. The educational role that psychologists play will not only help clients solve problems in the short-term, it will help them evaluate "too good to be true" promises long after their psychotherapy sessions end. In short, it will give clients the skills to help them recognize and avoid self-help snake oil and focus on methods that work.

Notes

1Anthony Pratkanis, a professor at the University of California at Santa Cruz, summarized this study and others in his article The Cargo-Cult Science of Subliminal Persuasion. Published in the Spring 1992 issue of the Skeptical Inquirer, it can be found online at www.csicop.org/si/9204/subliminal-persuasion.html. Interested readers may also want to check out Subliminal Perception: Facts and Fallacies by Timothy Moore (http://www.csicop.org/si/9204/subliminal-perception.html).

2For example, it can be found on page 200 of Anthony Robbins' (1986) best-seller Unlimited Power, and on page 26 of Bill Phillips' (1999) Body for Life (which even gets the legend wrong, describing it as being conducted at Harvard).

3See page 38 of their December, 1996 issue, or read it on the Internet at www.fastcompany.com/online/06/cdu.html. The quote from the Yale spokesperson at the end of the paragraph comes from that article as well.

For more about Dr. Kraus's science-based systems for success, visit his web site on Positive Psychology: The REAL Science of Success, or his Positive Psychology & Success Blog.

Note: This article was first published in the June 2005 issue of The San Francisco Psychologist (www.SFPA.net).

A Psychotherapist’s Guide to Facebook and Twitter: Why Clinicians Should Give a Tweet!

It seems strange today, but when I was a graduate student, nobody brought a laptop to school. I was lucky if my practicum sites had a computer that the office administrative assistant might permit me to use. I was the intern in the group who would beg whoever was working at the front desk to let me sneak on during our lunch hour so that I could check my email, write a quick blog post, or see what was happening on BMUG (Berkeley Mac Users Group). This was in 1998, which seems not very long ago, but which was eons ago in cybertime.

I’d been on the Internet since 1993, and I’d been a computer consultant for almost as long. By the time I enrolled in my PsyD program in 1996, I’d Internet dated, I’d connected with friendly folks across the country, and, I’d been on Craigslist when it was just a small email list sent out by Craig himself. I accessed Usenet before the World Wide Web was browsable, and “I spent much of 1994 lurking on support boards for polyamory and multiple personality disorder just because these forums allowed me to be a virtual fly on the wall and learn about the experiences of people whose lives were very different from mine.” The Internet was still a place that offered anonymity at that time, a land of pseudonyms and no powerful search engines to track the gingerbread crumbs back to your door. I can still remember what it sounded like when my 2400 bps modem connected to AOL: the distinctive sound of rubber band meets static as the modems on each side negotiated their connection.

I also remember becoming a psychology trainee a few years later and listening awkwardly when supervisors and professors spoke with confidence about people who were addicted to the Internet. Many of them made assumptions about those “Internet people." They were lazy couch potatoes who never left the house, or worse: antisocial porn addicts. “I seemed to be entering a field in which maybe my own Internet habits were a bit suspect.”

It’s now 2010 and it’s rare to find someone who isn’t on the Internet in some fashion. While many therapists may not have a social networking presence, most have email addresses and have used the Internet to locate a business, view a family member’s photos, or to watch a funny video on Youtube.

When I started my private psychotherapy practice in 2008, I made the shift from using the Internet for my personal life to using it in my professional life. An integral part of that shift entailed creating a website and a blog. In 2009, I expanded my professional Internet presence to include a Twitter account and a Facebook page for my private practice. Some other mental health professionals have been doing the same. It’s certainly a new era.

What is Social Media?

What is Facebook?

The main page of your Facebook profile is called a Wall and depending upon the privacy settings you select (which might limit who can post on your Wall, or who can even view the Wall itself) people can view things you post to your Wall or post items of their own onto your Wall. The sorts of things that get posted include Status Updates, which are brief comments you add about what you’re doing or something you care about. These Status Updates show up on the News Feed which is a constantly refreshing stream of what only an extremely social person could consider news: John just Liked a photo, Penny wrote on David’s Wall, Molly posted four pictures to Flickr (a photo-sharing site), Evan just overheard something funny. People also share news articles and Youtube videos or longer Notes, which are essays they write (or essays someone else wrote that someone wants to Share).

“Some people post incredibly personal updates on their Walls. I have been surprised more than once to learn of engagements, deaths, and divorces via Facebook Walls.” I sometimes discover this information reported on Facebook before ever getting a note or phone call from the person who posted the update. People have also used the Wall to share information about missing persons in their friend networks. News can travel fast, especially when people click the Share button and immediately are able to take a post from one user’s Wall and transmit it to everyone who reads their own Wall. When you have friend networks of 100–1000 people, you can imagine how this has become quite a tool for disseminating information.

This quick circulation of information has inspired some therapists to consider using Facebook as a platform for advertising their practices. Some do this directly from their Facebook profiles and others have created a separate business listing, known as a Page. If you can get friends, families, and strangers to Like your page (prior to April, 2010, they became a Fan of your Page), then others in their network can see this action and click through to your business to learn more.

Other therapists first get onto Facebook because they want to view family photos or find friends from high school or college. It’s a social networking site allowing you to connect to your friends and interact with them and their online profiles in a variety of ways. Where Facebook gets tricky for mental health professionals is that it is a personal space that exists in public.

Personal vs. Professional Space

Managing Friend Requests

Some therapists using Facebook have received requests from their current or former clients to add them as Friends. It is wise to think through how you plan to manage Friend requests from clients. Be mindful that inviting clients to your personal profile can be perceived as inviting them into your personal life. This can send mixed messages to clients, especially if they are unclear about therapeutic boundaries to begin with. “If you would never think of inviting a client to a cocktail party at your home with your friends and family present, then you may want to think twice about inviting them to be your Friend on Facebook (or approving their Friend requests).” It can be the online equivalent of inviting them into your social circle. It may also make them wonder who else in this social circle is in treatment with you. If clients try to add us as Friends on Facebook, or we try to Friend them (yes, thanks to Facebook "Friend" has become a verb)—even by either of us accidentally clicking on a link to invite everyone in our address book—the boundaries can become even more complicated. This suddenly brings up issues of confidentiality, dual role conflicts, and feelings of trust, boundaries, safety, and rejection. It can also create questions about whether you are responsible for attending to the information a client shares on her own profile and utilizing it in treatment.

Friends You Share

Pages vs. Profiles

The biggest problem with having a Page is that you will still have to decide how you feel about who Likes your practice. Will you want your family members listed on that Page for others to see? Will you accept current or former clients as people who endorse your Page? Having or allowing your clients to be connected to your public professional profile brings up issues of confidentiality. There is also the question of whether someone Liking your Page could be perceived as a testimonial. All Ethics Codes for psychologists, marriage and family therapists, and social workers prohibit us from requesting testimonials from current clients due to their being vulnerable to our influence. Is a Facebook Page a passive request for an endorsement or testimonial? This is one of the gray area questions that social media is raising for clinicians.

So What is Twitter?

Why, you may ask, would someone want to share 140 characters of information? Well, it’s a great way to direct people to news stories or make short announcements. Most people use it to share tidbits from their day and there are a lot of mundane Tweets about people’s life activities. But Twitter can get a lot more interesting if you search for news items or want to follow a conversation. For example, “some people have noticed that Twitter is the first place that they can find out if there was an earthquake in the San Francisco Bay Area and that those updates sometimes refresh more quickly than some of the well-known earthquake websites.”

If you’re presenting at a conference or offering a CE workshop or you have openings in a therapy group, Twitter can be one way to get that information out to your Followers. Yes, your Followers. That’s the cultish name Twitter gives to what others might refer to as subscribers of your content. When you sign up for a Twitter profile, you can start looking for others whom you might want to Follow, as well. You can search your address book to see if people you have exchanged email with are on there. This means that friends, family, and that random person you bought a futon from on Craigslist ten years ago will all show up if they have a Twitter account and if they’re in your contact list on your email account. But you can also browse Twitter’s suggested users to find people Tweeting on the topics you care about, and there are also Twitter directories if you want to search for more specialized information.

You can also have conversations with people on Twitter. You do this by @replying them. Your responses will show up on your Twitter profile page, and people can look at their @replies to see if others have responded to their messages. Twitter offers the ability to have either a public or private profile. Private profiles mean that only people you approve get to see your Tweets. If you have a public profile, anyone can read or reply to what you’re posting. Twitter also employs hashtags, which help people to find and follow conversations about a particular topic. Sometimes, people at a panel at a conference will assign the panel its own hashtag. For example a speaker may say: "This session has the hashtag #facebook_psych." When the hashtag is given, you can add the hashtag at the end of your Tweets so that others can click on it to find other public Tweets from people in the session. It also allows people outside the session to still participate in the conversation or ask questions of those who are there.

Why Would You Have a Professional Twitter Account?

My awkward moment occurred when I tried to use my friend network to publicize my practice on Twitter. I Tweeted on my locked, personal account that I was running a support group. A friend Retweeted it to his group of several hundred followers. While I appreciated his publicizing it to so many people, “I felt exposed and I realized that I didn't want my online pseudonym linked to my private practice.” I called him and explained and he deleted it immediately. This was how I recognized that maybe I couldn't have it both ways: using social networking to expand my reach but not allowing people to repost things. I wondered if it was time to create a Twitter account solely for my professional practice. But I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested in what a psychologist had to say on Twitter.

Weeks later, in February 2009, I met with a friend for one of our co-working dates and I batted the idea of the professional Twitter account back and forth with him. Within the hour, I created my @drkkolmes Twitter profile, used it to link to a few of my blog posts, and then sent an email out to a bunch of friends. In the email, I let them all know that I would not be following friends back on the Twitter account, as it was my intent to only follow other mental health organizations. But I asked if they would be kind enough to follow or publicize the account to others. About 15 people did.

That’s how it began.

By the end of 2009, my Follower count was over 800 people, and more importantly, I’d forged a number of fruitful collaborative projects with other mental health Tweeps (people who Tweet) on Twitter.

Branding & Marketing

I make sure to only use my professional name to post psychology related news, news about my practice, or to respond to others who are talking about these matters. I want to be sure that people know what to expect when they see my name float across their screens, and what I’d like them to expect are thoughtful posts about professional topics of interest to me. I also want them to think of me when particular subjects come up that are related to my expressed interests, since then, they can also alert me to these items if they see them first. Occasionally on Twitter someone may Tweet: "@drkkolmes, you might want to see this post about therapists Googling their clients," and I am pleased that they are sharing something interesting with me. But I’m especially pleased that they know what my professional interests are and that they can quickly let me know where I can find out more.

Professional Collaborations

Transparency

I blog about psychology-related topics that interest me. Since I do not allow comments on my blog and I do not wish to spend my online time moderating comments or worrying about the identity of people posting on my site, I invite readers to comment via private email and on Twitter. Oftentimes, people will Retweet my blog posts on Twitter or briefly respond to them and we might have a brief chat about it.

Another example of utilizing social media transparency is my Facebook Private Practice Page which I experimented with last May and later disabled the following April. I never had clients become Fans of the Page and I was fairly clear in my policies and blog posts that I felt this would be a confidentiality concern. But I finally decided the Page provided more risks than benefits. I discussed my reasons to disable it (summarized below) on my blog and on Twitter. In this way, social media through blogging, Facebook posts, or even Tweets can provide a platform to convey your thinking on topics when it may not always make sense to bring these topics into each and every therapy session. But it makes your process of thinking about such things available if and when clients get curious to know more about how you came to particular decisions. I did a similar thing with the development of my Private Practice Social Media Policy, blogging about it as I wrote it, so that those who cared to could understand how I came to my conclusions.

Cautionary Tales

The biggest potential problem with Facebook tends to be around managing Friend requests and controlling who posts on your Wall. Clinicians vary on their attitudes about handling Friend requests. Some feel strongly that it’s important to welcome any clients who want to endorse their Pages. Others feel strongly that it’s a huge HIPAA, confidentiality, and dual-relationship can of worms, which isn’t worth the potential headaches.

When I experimented with my own Facebook Page for my private practice, I was very clear that I would not allow clients to become Fans or to Like the Page. This invited criticism from other professionals who felt I was conveying mixed messages by having a Page that clients could not Fan if they wished to do so. My office policies stated that I would remove clients if they became Fans and some professionals expressed concern that this could be experienced as hurtful and rejecting to my clients and that it was too harsh a response.

Ultimately, I chose to delete my Facebook Page because monitoring the Wall postings and scanning to see who had followed the Page felt like more time and energy than I wanted to spend. It was time spent on worry and risk management, rather than pleasure. Ironically, I never had a single negative experience with clients on my Facebook Page, but I did have a couple of situations in which supportive, well-meaning friends posted comments that were too personal for my own comfort. This is always a risk on any social media page that allows others to post or comment. You cannot control what others write. But you can hit Delete. And Deleting people’s comments may make them feel hurt or censored. It’s one thing when it’s your friends or family who are experiencing this. But when it’s your client, you have a clinical dilemma of your own making.

Pitfalls of Twitter

There are times when you may find yourself tempted to get caught up in passionate exchanges on Twitter on issues that are meaningful to you. The conversation can be experienced so quickly as Tweets refresh that it’s compelling to respond immediately. But it’s hard to make a strong argument and fine-tune one’s tone in 140 characters. I try to keep the focus on lively conversations but there have been times that I felt baited by provocative Tweeters. I have sat with my fingers hovering over my keyboard, trying to compose a Tweet that I’d feel comfortable with any and all of my clients finding at some point down the line. And I will admit to a handful of times that I’ve deleted Tweets when I wasn’t sure I wanted to live with them forever. This has happened when I wasn’t sure if I’d expressed myself well or when I felt a corny joke fell flat. (Note that these will still show up in RSS readers and be archived if you have posted them under a public account. There also used to be a website called Tweleted that allowed you to view Tweets that had been deleted by users with public accounts.)

As your number of Followers increases, you will have more random comments, questions, and spam directed your way. I've had to learn to resist the impulse to reply to every question or comment. It is wise to conserve your time and energy and focus on conversations that have high value to you, but being more selective may bump up against your own worries of being rude or ignoring folks.

There was a time when I felt that I should try to confine my Tweets to "normal" waking hours. I have a tendency to stay up late at night. I like the quiet hours when I do most of my inspired writing and when I’m least likely to be interrupted. Sometimes I wake up at night and I may wind up online where I’ll find an interesting psychology-related news item that I want to Tweet. For a while, I worried that clients might know too much about my habits if I posted late at night. At some point, I gave up on worrying about the timing of my Tweets and decided to allow myself to do what felt natural to my own rhythms. What a relief. Now I feel that so long as I'm fully showing up for client sessions, giving my patients my full attention, and keeping good boundaries about the content of my Tweets, when I Tweet is really my own business. But it is an interesting conflation of both personal and professional space. In a similar vein, clinicians with public Twitter accounts may want to be aware of the effect it may have on clients if you are busy updating your social media profiles before responding to a client’s phone message or email. We may be unwittingly conveying a hierarchy of priorities that can leave clients feeling less important.

Another challenge of Twitter in regard to clinical care is the need to be aware that it’s not just our own therapy clients who may follow our postings there. In some cases, others in our clients’ lives may also follow us and this may have an impact both on the client and on our clinical relationship. For example, a client may share with one of his friends, family members, or relationship partners that he sees a therapist and that his therapist is on Twitter. These people may wind up with strong opinions about our social media presence or react to things we post, and this may put our client in the position of either feeling protective of us or feeling uncomfortable. Even clients who don’t tell others who their therapist is may have such feelings if and when they see us engaging with others on social media. And what of clients who have friends who follow our updates but who don’t know their friend is in treatment with us? By making ourselves public figures in this way, we’re certainly introducing some non-traditional dynamics into the traditional therapy relationship. Of course, this potential tension has always existed with therapists who write books or are public speakers, but social media increases the ability to immediately access a therapist’s public presence.

Conclusion

I see one’s professional online identity—so long as the interactions are professional and not personal—as a form of community outreach. I have compared it to working in a college counseling center and then visiting a class that your client may be a student in, such as when a community event affects the campus and you provide information or do a presentation. Sometimes we are visible in the community as mental health professionals and clients may see us acting in this role outside of therapy sessions. An online professional presence can be similar. Some of us are teachers, writers, and lecturers, as well as clinicians. This is our professional life. Perhaps we do not have to exist in a vacuum, only functioning as clinicians in our therapy sessions. Existing online does not have to mean we cannot hold the frame with our clients, nor does it have to mean we are incapable of boundaries or talking about the effects of our online visibility on clients, when necessary. But we are going to have to develop tools and systems to learn to take care of boundaries in new ways and be present to talk with clients about the effect our online lives have on the clinical relationship.